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Diary of a Divorced City Girl

The Fiance Who Loves His Girl’s Friends To Bits

As Ife helped her friends into a stretch Hummer she’d organised to take them all to the night club where they’d planned a ‘hen’ party for Fade, her best friend, she had no inkling of the nightmare that would later unfold. “We’d started drinking from another friend’s house where we had all assembled. By the time we got to the club close to midnight, we were slushed.

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Relationship: Do you have a way you cope with your man’s philandering

Have you ever regretted decisions that have reshaped your life, whether for better or for worse? At a recent get-together with a couple of friends, we became so relaxed, some of us started discussing our dead marriages. Out of about 12 of us in the group, only three were currently in their ‘husbands’ homes, we’ve all fared pretty well after the divorce, but would any of us have wished she’s acted differently, knowing how mercurial the state of matrimony is now? “The end of my marriage came as a terrible shock to me,” confessed Abi, a pharmacist running a lucrative chemist. “But it shouldn’t have. Even though I was with my husband for over 15 years, the cracks had started shortly after the birth of our third son.

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You must not equate excessive jealousy with love!

At a recent funeral reception this male face tried catching my eye and when he did he would smile. I gave a tentative smile after a while and he sauntered over to my table. “Sunkanmi?”, I asked, the penny finally dropping! I’d known him for ages. I got to know him through a very dear friend and we were often going out in a group. His girlfriend, Dora, worked with an airline and was always travelling. In spite of having a thriving business, Sunkanmi, seemed to have all the time for Dora. He was virtually her shadow – you seldom saw one without the other. His attention was so stifling that Dora was getting fed up with his unfounded jealousy.

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What exactly is your wife telling her friends about your sex-life!?

Women have been known to be the worst kind of blabbermouths – they tell each other everything and anything. “But to the point of discussing intimate bedroom secrets of their partners?” gawked Desmond when I reminded him of this fact. Married for 16 years, he’d a bit of a misunderstanding with his wife. Again! Was he doing something wrong? Did Labo, his wife’s best friend have an insight into what his wife believe he should be doing? Taking courage in his hands, he recently had a word with Labo. As their little `talk’ progressed, he squirmed as Labo processed to confide in him some of the things that were bugging her friend.

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Why settle for Mr. Right when you can have Mr. Rich?

There comes a time in a woman’s life when she has to decide who to settle with and make a go for him. Laila had once briefly engaged to her childhood sweetheart who took off with one of her close friends. Now approaching 30, she’s been involved with Joseph, a photographer who runs his own studio. “He specialises in society events and sells photographs to most of these society magazines”, explained Laila. “She’d taken so much time and money setting up his business that he didn’t give marriage a thought until he was convinced he could look after a prospective family.

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What shameless woman sleeps with her friends son?

There’s no limit to how low some women will sink to satisfy their raging libido! Ayoka, (one of the gang, remember?) was on a well-deserved rest abroad and was looking forward to seeing the two children who currently live in their London flat, Sesan, 28 is her step-son and her own, Gbola is in his early 20s. She had hardly settled in when Gbola told her Sesan was in a hot mess that needed to be sorted out. Her precious step-son was sleeping with one of her friends!

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You can have the best of two worlds!

You’ll be amazed at what excuse some people give for having their own back on anyone nasty enough to rub them the wrong way. For three months, Benny had a fantastic time ‘bonding’ with Elijah, her new found love. “A tenis freak, he is an accountant, intelligent and super fit. We sort of clicked until he invited me over to his eldest sister’s 50th birthday party. They’d lost their parents in quick succession and Eli’s Sister, Gbemi is now like the head of the family. A sort of mother-hen, most of her sibblings and family members were in awe of her.

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Why are men such braggarts?

I don’t know what gives the average man the impression that when it comes to sex, his female partner wants the whole works – heavy foreplay, all-night long sex and loads of orgasms. Where he thinks he falls below par, he makes up stories to portray himself a stud. That is how Yunus recently became trapped in his web of lies. “I’ve lied to my girlfriend of nine months about having had a rampant sex life and I’m not sure whether to own up or not”, he said.

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Don’t take your sex life for granted!

Most men think they’re great in bed”, observed Jane, a marriage counsellor.

“But much as we love our men, a five minute quickie before lights out really doesn’t get the earth moving! It’s not that they lack enthusiasm. They’re just being typical male – always ready for action. The problem is their technique – most of them don’t have any. Foreplay is clumsy and hurried, and as for the sex, it’s always wham, barn, was that it?!

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