Thousands of children live in step-families all over the country as divorce has made fractured homes commonplace. Yet behind the facade of normality, it’s rarely plain sailing. Getting the brunt of the flak is the ‘wicked’ step-mother, Oyinda, a 45-year-old mother of three who re-married a few years ago. Ade, her new husband was a dad of one daughter, Ibi, who was thoroughly spoilt by Christy, her dotting silver-spoon mother.

Three days after she had her first child, Halimat’s husband, Doja, brought mother and child home – with Doja’s mother happily ensconce in the family home. “Shortly after we arrived, I put my son in the Moses’ basket we already had ready for him”, Halimat said. “All of a sudden, the sound of my newborn son’s cries filtered through to the living room, stinging my ears and piercing my heart. I rushed to where he was but I was too late. He was already in the possessive grasp of my mother-in-law who’d placed an exclusion zone of fierce grand-motherly love around him, barring all from going near.

Even if there was a blue print for having a healthy relationship, chances are it wouldn’t work for each individual the same way. Man meets woman, a relationship develops and within weeks, you are in seventh heaven. Your man is the ‘soul mate’ you have always dreamt of – you virtually live in each other’s pockets and you can’t stop pinching yourself on how lucky you are.

We’ve all failed at one project or the other and learnt to move on. But a lot of people have received such mighty failures that they’re just not able to shake off and the depth of despair they feel is difficult to bear. A few years back, Remi, just 24 got married. “Adam and I had been together since I was 19,” she explained.

Imagine when your pregnancy is scanned for the first time so you could see your precious baby growing in the womb, suddenly its whole body gives a shudder and the foetus appears to jump. Such a movement is known as the startle reflex, and the scan described above are from photographs from scans that were taken by Peter Hepper, a professor of psychology at Queens University, Belfast and an expert on the effects of alcohol on unborn babies.

Isn’t it amazing how some people rejoice widely when their perceived enemies die? Some years back, when I was still an eight-to-five staff of a financial institution, I was in the office when I heard these peals of laughter coming from a colleague in the next office. I hurried to investigate and found him clinging to a friend of his, both screaming their heads off with glee. “What happened,” I asked excitedly, “did you win something?”

It’s been tagged the most amazing remedy – sleep. Scientific findings tel! you it helps you live longer and boosts your immune system. It puts you in a great mood, reduces your risk of everything from heart disease to diabetes – and it’s completely free. It has no side – effects and is available to everyone.

If I’d known that Lola would resort to flirting, and eventually be put in the family way by a first School Leaving Certificate holder, when she fully knew that my undertaking a postgraduate course was to better our lot, I would have waited until I’d completed my course before I plunged into marriage.” Yomi declared sadly, narrating to me the story of his broken marriage, the shock from which he has not yet recovered.

A person desperate to have a relationship would swallow any lies dished out by an opportunist out to have a good time and nothing else. Often times though, you get trapped in the web of lies you weave and what happens? “Towards the end of last year, I put myself in a bit of trouble,” recalled Boye, a technician with a big IT company that specialises in installations of highly-sophisticated satellite products.

By Bunmi Sofola How do you spot a love rat? The current man in your life has virtually swept you off your feet. He texts you all day, takes you to your favourite eatery from time to time, buys you little gifts and calls you at night because he ‘cant stop thinking of you’! The […]

Getting pregnant seems like a lottery sometimes where anxious people dying for a child come up with the booby price. For close to six years, Rele and her husband had been desperately seeking for a child. “We tried everything”, they said, “Lawrence, my husband, had the right sperm count but I had a blockage in one of my fallopian tubes and there was no reason why the other one shouldn’t work. In desperation, I relocated abroad and was able to go through two cycles of IVF on the National Health. It wasn’t a pleasant experience, believe me, yet nothing happened.

YOUR feelings are hurt and you want your other half to know it. You stamp round the house, slamming doors, tossing your head and sighing heavily. But he seems oblivious. You move on to the silent treatment and he still carries on as normal. It’s only when you cry with frustration that he actually comes over and puts his arm around you.

For some women, hitting the menopause could kill off their sex life. “For almost 30 years, I had a great sex life with the man I eventually married,” said Oge, now 54 and a matron in a private hospital. “I’d had beautiful orgasms with him most of the time until two years ago when I reached the menopause and my orgasms simply disappeared.