By Funmi Komolafe

We are all welcome into the seventh month; July.  Some call it the month of perfection.  In the name of Jesus everything in our lives that requires the touch of God will be made perfect this month.

Today’s edition of joyful   homes will digress to focus on Men ,  I mean men in marriage.

Often times, we think that men do not have challenges beyond financial needs  .

In other words, women often think that a man’s major   concern or worry is about how to be the real Man in the house; his ability to cater for the financial needs of the family.

To a large extent, this is true but even where a man is financially successful, he  is faced with more serious challenges that can deny him a joyful home.

What exactly do I mean?  First, we’ll take a look at the company a man keeps.   Most married men in Nigeria dislike being guided by their wives.   They ascribe to themselves the  unquestionable  leadership  of the home.

To some extent, they are right .    Colossians  3 vs. 18 states unambiguously, “ Wives, submit  yourselves  unto  your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord”.

Verse. 19 adds “ Husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them”.

In  reality, men even in Christian homes see themselves as all knowing and do not regard the pieces of advice from their spouses.

However, both spouses must realize that in a Christian home, Jesus is the head of the home.  Indeed, Jesus is the breadwinner. Our Lord is the provider.

I am led to this issue because of the rate at which anti- marriage spirit is ravaging homes including homes of Christian  sisters.

Women whose husbands are financially stable or are rich themselves usually believe that   their marriage is stable.  In reality, this isn’t so.   The more stable the family is financially, the more the threat to marital peace by strange women, envious relations  or even neighbours.

To drive this point home, I will share with you a real life story.   A young man richly blessed by God with a Christian wife and God-fearing children sudden found himself in an unholy relationship with a lady.  Of course,  unknown to the wife.  One day, the Lord revealed this relationship to  a family friend, who immediately called the couple and warned them .  Unknown to her, at the time she put her call through, the couple were in an argument over the husband’s adulterous relationship.   God revealed to this family friend that the man’s association with the lady will surely bring him down financially.

How?  We’ll return to that later.

But what does the Bible say about such relationship?  Our authority is found in 1st Corinthians 6 vs. 9  “ Know ye not  that the unrighteous  shall not inherit  the kingdom of God?  Be no deceived: neither fornicators , nor idolaters, nor adulterers nor abusers of themselves with mankind”.

We have this erroneous belief that it is only women whose bodies can be abused.  When the Bible said   your  body is the temple of God it didn’t say it’s for women only.

1st. Corinthians 6 vs.19 and 20  “ What! Know ye not  that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost  which is in you, which ye have of God and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s”.

To shorten the story, this man instead of putting an end to this relationship now known to the wife,   sank deeper.  He went about showing the lady his landed property and the woman set a trap for him .   He got her pregnant. So, the lady became triumphant.  She boasted that she set out for a lottery and she had won.  Meanwhile this lady had two children for a man she was married to but separated from.

Weeks after the child was born, things went down for the man financially.   A home that bought their  food items in bags, began to buy in trickles.  Money became as scarce as gold.   Contracts already given to him were either suspended or cancelled.   Someone whose bank accounts read millions could hardly boast of N10,000.

His wife became so bitter that she said, the poverty should continue so that they all suffer.    However, she was advised to rather pray the stranger out of her  marriage  and pray for the success of her husband.

The point I am making here is that men fall into temptation from strange women.   So , it is the duty of the wife to be the prayer warrior of the family in her own interest.

In the name of Jesus, whatever is standing as an obstacle to your marital peace, the Lord will remove today.

Or what do you say to   bankers who  are single ladies  and their target is to lure the man into a relationship because of  the record of his bank account.

Many men fall into such traps because of the company they keep.  When they go out drinking and associating with women of easy virtues, they believe they are enjoying life.  Whereas in reality, the forces of darkness are ruining their lives and most times before they realize it has become to late.

What most people call enjoyment in life, is actually the key to their disconnection with holiness.    It is what draws them away from God and for one without God, the consequence can never be palatable.

Galatians 5  vs. 19 to 21  “ Now the works of  the flesh are manifest,  which are these, adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance emulations, wrath, strife, editions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revelings, and such like of the which I  tell you before, as I have also told you  in time past, that they which do such things  shall not inherit the kingdom of God”.

Verse 22 “ But the fruit of the Spirit  is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness , faith”.

Brethren you can read up this chapter up to verse 26.

What one is saying is that families ,in which you see couples stick together, grow old, and  bring up God fearing children who are also great achievers, the couple   had sacrificed the so-called pleasures of life.

Those who choose   these so called enjoyment, usually have bitter stories in the end.  It is in such homes that you find children from many mothers   struggling over  a late father’s property.     They know no peace because their parents especially fathers by their actions sowed the seed of discord and sorrow when they thought they were enjoying life.

Sisters, do not say, my husband is a Pastor so no such temptation can come his way.  You deceive yourself.   These days, some single ladies are in church to seduce Pastors and break homes .

In the name of Jesus,  all plans of the forces of darkness against your marriage, the Lord will scatter.

It is important that we all appreciate that the institution of marriage is not just physical but also  has a Spiritual dimension.

When couples   make vows before the Lord on wedding days, many do not realize the full implication of the vow.  They see it as simply reciting what the Pastor has written or led them to read.

Far from it, brethren, the consequence of breaking such vows, could bring in generational curses.

My prayer is that the Lord will guide us in all that we do.

In subsequent editions, we shall continue issues related to this topic.

Resolve today to lay a foundation a joyful home.

It is not too late to retrace your steps and you’ll find that you will enjoy the peace of the Lord in Jesus name.



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