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When did you realise you were approaching your sell-by-date?!

Did you just suddenly wake up one day, look at yourself in the mirror and say: “My God! I’m getting old!” Or did the realisation creep in on you until you just can’t ignore it? Roli, now in her late 50s used to be a model and now runs her own modelling agency. She told me: “I’ll never forget that incident as long as I live. I was crossing the road to enter a trendy spa a close friend had just opened in a high-brow shopping mall, when I caught a glimpse of a tubby woman reflected in the spa’s huge windows. When her strides started to mirror mine, it hit me: she was me!

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Revenge sex is never the smart thing to have! 

Revenge sex – done purely to get back at someone who’s hurt you – rarely pays off even though it sounds great in theory. Your partner cheated on you; why not get your own back by cheating on them so they can see how it feels to get hurt? Deolu found it out the hard way that bonking other women because his girlfriend hurt him brought him a lot of mystery. “It put me into an awful situation and I don’t know how to get outfit”, he admitted.

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Relationships: I lost my virginity to him, yet he thinks I’m cheating

My boyfriend complains and sometimes gets upset that my vagina is looser than other times. He thinks I’m cheating, but I’m not. I lost my virginity to him when I was 19 and we are planning to get married when I graduate from the University. Now, I’m 22 and we are still an item and this problem is surfacing. What’s going on?

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A house built on sand

Though it had not come as a big surprise, still everyone was thoroughly miffed and disappointed when Toyin announced that she was pregnant. There was no doubt that she planned to keep the baby, otherwise, the announcement of the pregnancy would not have taken place. She would have found a solution to it, if she had truly considered it a problem and wanted it out.

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The virgin bride who saw the light!

Lara and Paul came from two strictly religious families and when providence eventually threw them together at a Church concert, they believed it was the Lord’s doing. “We’d both had relationships before but were in-between partners when we met over 15 years ago”, recalled Lara. “I’d left work early to help in a fund-raising play the Church was organising and Paul was in charge of the music. He certainly took his duties seriously and thanks to his efforts, we had a very successful outing

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He lies repeatedly about everything but I love him

I have dated a guy for over a year and a half and from the beginning was very attracted to him and had deep feelings for him. Lack of emotional intimacy and communication seemed to be the major problem. I was open, honest and patient with him, but no matter what I did to try to understand him and build the friendship, he always seemed too afraid to let me really know him. He lied repeatedly about everything it seemed and everything in his life was secretive.

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I was raped!

I have been living in shame and most times, I’m very depressed. When I was living with my uncle, one of his friends did something very bad to me and I have not been able to say it out until now. I was violently raped and on my own, I went to the hospital. I was told that I need to get a pap test and other tests as there could be damage from the force used. I’m really frightened about the whole idea of it. Do I have to be lying down and what do they do? It’s stressing me out! I’m 23 now but the rape happened when I was 22.

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Relationship: Do you have a way you cope with your man’s philandering

Have you ever regretted decisions that have reshaped your life, whether for better or for worse? At a recent get-together with a couple of friends, we became so relaxed, some of us started discussing our dead marriages. Out of about 12 of us in the group, only three were currently in their ‘husbands’ homes, we’ve all fared pretty well after the divorce, but would any of us have wished she’s acted differently, knowing how mercurial the state of matrimony is now? “The end of my marriage came as a terrible shock to me,” confessed Abi, a pharmacist running a lucrative chemist. “But it shouldn’t have. Even though I was with my husband for over 15 years, the cracks had started shortly after the birth of our third son.

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