Dear Bunmi,

My boyfriend and I are in our late twenties and we live together. We earn good salaries, have a car each and I love him very much. However, since we’ve started living together, I’ve discovered that I’m usually bad-tempered with him.

When an argument hots up, I lash out at him though I usually feel contrite afterwards. We usually argue about when we should get married but he always sees no need to rush into it as he puts it.

He’s now started reacting to my violence and has threatened to retaliate if I continue. How do I curb this?

Ekaete by e-mail.

Dear Ekaete,

I guess the fact that your boyfriend sees no reason in getting married now

that you’re both living together has made you a frustrated partner. But domestic violence is not the answer. If you want marriage and he doesn’t, then you have to decide whether or not to stay in the relationship.

Have a talk together and decide which would be the way forward for both of you. In the meantime, when next you feel the urge to strike out, count one to ten or leave the room.