Detaching yourself from a toxic environment can be a difficult task, but it is necessary for your mental and emotional well-being. With the current state of our nation, it won’t be wrong to describe Nigeria as toxic. Otherwise, why are Nigerians “japa-ing” in droves daily? A toxic environment can be described as a setting where negative behaviors such as manipulation, conflicts, and unhealthy conversations are prevalent. Such an environment can cause stress, anxiety, and depression, leading to a decrease in productivity, happiness, and peace of mind.

I know relocating to other countries isn’t unusual and has been happening for decades. However, we are witnessing an unprecedented number of professionals leaving the country. Nigerians are leaving for nations that provide a much higher chance for an individual to thrive, a place where basic needs such as security, quality education, regular power supply, and healthcare aren’t luxuries, and where critical infrastructures that necessitate dreams are available. 

Social media is rife with conversations among young people who are exhausted from not getting ahead, and they are channelling all their efforts into saving enough money to leave the country. Permit me to reinstate that indeed our nation’s level of toxicity is high.

I must admit, this year has been particularly tough on the mental health of well-meaning Nigerians. The run-up to the elections brought a sliver of hope, and all that hope was snatched away quickly. The incomprehensible tribal war during the gubernatorial elections further created a divide in an already fragile state of the nation. The violence meted out to some well-meaning Nigerians who were believed to be of a particular tribe is despicable and a few WhatsApp groups I belong to moved from fun and enjoyable spaces to battlefields in the blink of an eye. Many of these incidents are triggers for mental disruption. They can create a sense of hopelessness in some people, leading to the breakdown of relationships and internal chaos.

We hear about toxic workplaces, relationships, and communities, and it is advised to leave those spaces but what do you do when it’s your own country and you have nowhere else to go, or maybe you don’t desire to go anywhere else? I believe the conversation must shift to coping mechanisms and wellness strategies. 

I’m not saying it will be easy, but it’s a battle you must win if you want to maintain your sanity while living in Nigeria.

Here are a few suggestions to help you:

Recognize Toxicity: Recognizing and acknowledging the source of toxicity in your surroundings is the first step to change. Once you have identified what is causing the toxicity, you can begin to distance yourself from it. I have identified social media as a source of toxicity for me, so I have set boundaries to manage this. While I want to stay in the loop with what’s happening, I don’t want to know everything that is happening every single day. Boundaries mean choosing social media engagements that uplift you and avoiding ones that lead to distress. The same goes for news and blogs. Upholding these boundaries will create a shield of protection and contribute to a healthier and more positive environment for yourself.

Identify Safe & Warm Spaces: You don’t know how much you need this until you are totally burnt out. For this reason, you need to have already identified these safe spaces. They can be relationships, communities (online or offline), or locations where you can relax and release stress. I have identified walking in nature or going to the beach as my own warm spaces. The tides of the ocean send good vibes throughout my being, and I forget (at least in the moment) the pressures of living in Nigeria. I work out five mornings a week, and I still make sure I go for a walk by the ocean most evenings. Yes, I drive down to a gorgeous estate to experience the evening sunset. It is truly bliss.

Focus on Self-care: To replenish your emotional reserves, prioritize self-care. Self-care is basically self-preservation in action. It’s taking an active role in protecting your well-being and happiness. Exercise has been one of my go-to self-care practices for years. I also play tennis three times a week. You could say I am a physical activity enthusiast. Other forms of self-care include engaging in activities that bring you joy, practicing mindfulness and relaxation techniques, and nourishing your body with a healthy diet. Taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional well-being will fortify you for the challenges presented by a toxic environment.

Seek Rejuvenation Frequently: Depletion needs renewal. Every negative news, video, or conversation depletes your energy, and sometimes you need an elaborate mode of rejuvenation. I am currently on a trip outside of Nigeria, and I had been looking forward to this trip since the upheaval of the elections. I am here now, and I have turned down the volume on news from Nigeria. I only check in to receive updates about the biggest court case in the country because the results matter to me. If you can, travel outside of Nigeria. It helps to remind you of what sanity looks like and how some other people are privileged to live in a working system. It will definitely do you some good.

I love Nigeria, and I have no immediate plans to relocate anywhere else, but I am not oblivious to the daily traumas of living here. That being said, you need to intentionally tune out the daily disruption – go into oblivion if you must. With the ongoing court case and the heated conversations along tribal lines on social media I doubt we’ve seen the end of tension. If you are reading this, I am extending love and light to you. 

Take care of yourself as you navigate the political and economic atmosphere in Nigeria.