When my friend comes to spend time with me, I pay for everything.

Recently, I went to her place and she treated me shabbily. She barely cooked, and begrudged me a second piece of meat.

One evening, she refused to let me have a bath because she claimed she bought water all the time.

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She even complained about the foodstuffs I used. Now she’s asking when she can come to visit me again.

What can I say?

Itunnu, by e-mail.

Dear Itunnu,     

If you’re inclined to give this woman a second chance, I suggest you get the ground rules established before she arrives.

Outline what you’re prepared to do and pay for, and insist on a sort of kitty for any extras.

 If she’s not happy with that, she can stay away.

Personally, I wouldn’t have anything more to do with someone who denied me basic sustenance and courtesy.

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