Dear Bunmi,

I WAS diagnosed as HIV positive a couple of years ago. I was referred to a  teaching hospital and the medication I received is keeping me well, but I get  depressed and have withdrawn from friends and go out alone. Last month, I met someone at a family do and later slept with him for affection. The problem is, I didn’t tell him I was HIV positive and, stupidly, we didn’t   use any contraception. Now I’m terrified of what he will think or do if I tell him.

What should I do?

Riyike, by e-mail.

Dear Riyike,

I really understand that your illness is making you depressed. But surely, the

fact that you know how awful HIV can be means that you shouldn’t pass it on to other people. You have to get up the courage to come clean with this man so that he can get help as soon as possible.

Perhaps one of the reasons you don’t feel able to do this, and also one of the reasons why the HIV is hitting you so hard, is that you’re isolated. When next you go for your round of medication at the teaching hospital ask the officials to put you on to a support group for the right counselling. They’re quite discreet in helping

patients find the help they need.