Dear Bunmi,

My boss is 22 years older than I am and is married. He’s always laughing and flirting with the women in the office, including me. Then, towards the end of last year, his behaviour towards me changed. Whenever he hugged me, he would hold on for a moment too long. He also started sending me e-mails telling me personal things. I told myself he didn’t mean anything by it, but at an official party last Christmas, he put his hand up my dress.

The following week, he called me into his office and told me that he was unhappy with my work. He said that if I didn’t improve, I’d lose my job. My work has never been called into question before and I’m very upset. Do I try to talk to my boss about what happened or should I just report him to personnel?

Miriam by e-mail.

 Dear Miriam,

I’d be wary of reporting him. Once you do, there’s no going back. Though he shouldn’t be allowed to get away with this abuse of office and sexual harassment, you want to tackle this problem with a clear head. If you have to resort to reporting him, go to personnel armed with any evidence, such as e-mails. You may find it isn’t the first such complaint they’ve had. Why not try talking to him first and see if it gets you anywhere? If it doesn’t, then report him.