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He was the only one who turned me on

Dear Bunmi,

For over two years, I had a relationship with a man who was a terrible boyfriend in most ways. I know he loved me in his own way. To crown it all, he was amazing in bed and I’ve never had a better orgasm than with him. Since we broke up, the men I’ve slept with seem boring, though they’re a lot nicer. Will I ever find another man as good as my ex?

Tope, by e-mail.


Dear Tope,

Love-making isn’t all about technique. One of the reasons it’s so powerful is that it hooks into emotions. My guess is that love-making isn’t good to you right now because you’re not over your ex, and you’ve not got involved emotionally with these other partners.

Why don’t you wait until you’ve recovered from your break-up? Then find a man who cares for you and who you care for. Discover what works for you both in bed. It’ll take time, but you will rediscover true passion.


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