By Bunmi Sofola
New research have confirmed that single women have fewer orgasms, while their male counterparts have the most. According to one of the researchers, having an orgasm is more like running a marathon than a sprint, but for many women, it is uphill terrain. That when it comes to orgasms, women are still the underdogs. According to data from 2014 survey conducted by online marketing company, Columinate, in partnership with Durex on women’s sexual well-being, not even 50% of women climax: and not only are they unsatisfied with their sex lives, they also have ‘worrying’ low self-esteem.
“They still patronise men’s orgasms,’ says Debby Herbenick, director of Indiana University’s Center for Sexual Health Promotion. “Perhaps it’s because when a man finishes, very often, sex does too – or because, physically, the male orgasm is like a neatly tied bow, while the female is like a Valentino gown. (It’s complex and can take a while to construct but boy, is it gorgeous …) It can be hard to explain this to a partner – especially when you are both naked. The good news: women are making strides towards closing the gap. “It’s all about exploring what feels good for you,” she says.
Not all women need to have an orgasm every time for sex to be hot, she continues. But most would like more. These are three tips she says can help you get over the edge: Do yoga for your vagina. Keep the energy flowing down there by taking deep breaths and imagining sending them to your lady cave. Sounds wack – but it’s basically the free female Viagra.
Don’t be afraid to reveal a kinky desire. No fetish is anti-feminist. Just because you sometimes like being called a slut during sex doesn’t mean you ever like it during dinner.
(Silently) tell yourself how much you’re turning him on. Whether he’s a Chatty Charlie or a quiet type in the sack, seeing his face as he’s lost in ecstasy – and realising you’re making it happen – can be the push you need to cross the finish line!
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