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May 8, 2011

Sexless marriages!

Some time ago, I wanted to make love to my wife and realized that I didn’t have an erection, I almost freaked out. Until now I had heard that it happens to men that are in their forties and above, but I never believed it can happen to me, because I had always thought I was “George of the Jungle”.

Did I perceive some of you younger men laughing at me? Don’t worry; laugh all you can, because your turn is coming. Before this day that I was writing about, I had been under intense stress, and didn’t take out time to rest, then wanted to catch my fun upon all that, and to my greatest surprise and shock, bobo was not responding.

My poor Lawrenta did everything she could, tried performing magic, but it still didn’t work, then we resorted to seeking for a miracle and started binding and losing in case it was the hands of my Father’s people from the village, it still didn’t work, and we finally gave up. You need to see how traumatized I was on that day. I was so ashamed of myself as a man, and went to bed without eating. Thank God, God gave me peace and I slept.

When I woke up the next morning, and realized bobo was alive again, I went on my knees and sang praises to God, and quickly made the best use of it speaking in tongues throughout, in case my enemies decide to strike again. It was an experience of a life time. You women don’t know what men who can’t have a penile erection go through psychologically, emotionally, mentally, and even physically. And you even make it worse for us when we discover you are cheating on us because we can’t have an erection. Some men have committed suicide after they discovered about their wife’s infidelity. On the other hand, I am sure women feel worse too when they discover another lady has a child for their husband outside, just because they can’t give birth yet.

I am sure when men and women know how much they cause each other harm and how terrible the effect can be on their significant other, maybe and just maybe they may become more sensitive to each other, and try to make amends, though I know some of us are married to Evil men and women who are so insensitive and may never change, unless the Mercy of God prevails in their lives. And such are the men and women who are no longer sleeping with their spouses despite the fact that there is nothing wrong with them physiologically, but are just determined to give the NO SEX TREATMENT as a punishment for what they claim their spouse has done against them. What a shame.

The first time I encountered this situation was when I went to consult for a popular Church in Port Harcourt years ago. When I had a session with the Pastors and their Wives, I discovered that some of the Pastors were no longer sleeping with their wives, because they claimed that they don’t like the way their wives dress, that their wives were not respectful to members of their own families, or one stupid reason or the other. And because these set of Pastors I am talking about own their own organizations or are big men in Government, they had the luxury of taking some of the small small girls in their Church for trips in Dubai, South Africa etc. So while their wives are languishing at home, wondering if they should resort to the use of Vibrator, just masturbate or become lesbians, Pastor CEO is busy with Sister Caro in Dubai. What caught my attention on that day and almost made me commit murder was a particular case of a Pastor and his wife, during my personal session with them, the wife had mentioned amongst other things that he has not been having sex with her for almost three years. When I had finished my session with them, and they got up to go, the Wife who is highly revered in the Church went on her knees and held on to her husband’s jacket and turned to me saying “help me beg him to please have sex with me tonight”, and where ever the man walk to moving with pride like a peacock, the woman on her knees followed him. I was disgusted and almost would have shot at him if I had a gun, but from nowhere, I just told the woman to get up, and I started in front of him to tell her how beautiful she looks like I saw it right there and there. I described her from the crown of her head to the sole of her feet. I didn’t miss out the details of her eyes, nose, lips, shoulders, breasts, lovely tummy, hips, buttocks etc. I also told her what to put on that will make her shape become more unique. Then right in front of him still, I asked if she really wanted to have sex like yesterday, and she said like 3 years ago, and I asked her not to worry because I don’t think her husband is totally obedient to God and one of the Curses for such a man in the book of Deuteronomy 28; is that he will get a wife and another man will lie with her. So I asked her to be a bit patient for that curse to be established in his life. I couldn’t believe I said that or what made me say that, but to my greatest surprise, this proud man sobered and asked me where that was in the Bible and I showed him. He sank back in the chair and pulled his wife to himself and started to confess that he had being having an affair, and that all the while I Jerome, was describing and admiring her, that it was like some scales fell off his eyes and he began to see her beauty again. Right there and there, he made arrangements for the children to be taken home, and they moved into a Suite where they stayed for 3 nights all by themselves. I am sure I may not employ that style of counseling again, but thank God that it worked and I was happy for that woman, because I know what it is for a Married woman to be starved of SEX. Ray Parker junior was not a prophet, neither was he a preacher, but he said in one of his songs years ago that “A woman needs love just like you do, don’t kid yourself into thinking that she don’t, she can fool around, just like you do, unless you give her all the loving she wants”, he ended the song by saying “By the time poor Jack returns up the hill, somebody else has been loving Jill because a woman needs love”. Now that unfortunately is what is happening right now, a lot of married women are finding solace right now in the hands of other men who are helping their husbands out by giving them the sex their husbands wouldn’t give. May God have mercy on us and help us stop this Diabolical work of deception going on in our marriages, as it’s just a ploy of the enemy to destroy our marriages, families, societies, communities, nations etc.

So what about a woman whose husband is impotent, what should she do? Or a Man whose wife has refused to make love to him because she says he is not bringing in Money to the house? What about the woman or man whose husband or wife has a terminal illness and sex is the last thing the one that is ill can give now? Well I can only tell you that I know being in a Sexless Marriage can be suicidal, and we cannot resolve everything in one article, but will continue throughout the month of May, and end up in a Seminar tagged “BEDROOM SECRETS” on the last Saturday of May. It will be full of practical information and I am sure you don’t want to miss it. It’s designed for people within the age range of 25-65 years of age. Though it’s not just for the married only, but if you are married and below 25, you may inquire. Do I still have penile erectile issues personally, well I am on top of it now, and Lawrenta is having fun. Stay with me next week as I continue to look at SEXLESS MARRIAGES.