By Debbie Ogunjobi
Last week yielded its share of surprises and I was blessed to see a lot of faces I hadn’t seen in decades. The opportunity came at the 70th birthday celebrations of my secondary school principal.

I had received a text from an old school mate informing me of the event and I had decided to be there. It was unfortunate that I had taken a painkiller that almost knocked me into a delirious high the night before but seven extra hours of sleep made me lucid enough to get out of bed and go.

It was great to see Mrs. Adebo and I pray I am that smart, alert and composed at 70; she hadn’t changed at all! I initially thought I would have to introduce myself but was pleasantly surprised to have her call out my name and that of all the others; her memory was superb.

As occasions go it was quite nice and it shows what an impact her life has had if people she led so many years ago dropped all to see her on a day as dull and rainy as Tuesday was. I was only going to stay a while but a downpour put paid to any other plans and I had decided to wait and see some of the old friends that were coming.

I’m not great at social gatherings so I hadn’t attended any of the reunions that had been done in the past and I had to explain why I could not be located on the social network sites like all the others.

I had been convinced into opening a face book account by my loved ones a while back but was inundated with so many requests by people I didn’t remember or knew that I had just shut it down.

In the middle of our reminiscences’ an old classmate walked in and promptly told me off for a perceived snub I had given her some years ago. My mind initially drew a blank and she went on to say she had been at one of my stores and I had told her to give me five minutes to round up a meeting I was having.

She had left angrily after waiting for me for over 20 minutes and had decided I hadn’t wanted to see her. I didn’t want to aggravate the situation further by confessing that I didn’t even have any recollection of the meeting at all but just apologized and reminded her that my forgetfulness which was legendary in school hadn’t improved with age.

We all started to catch up on each other’s news and not long after one of the most effusive and friendly students back in school walked in.

It was impossible not to notice her reservation and withdrawn nature; and one of us mentioned it and even took her up on it but she just smiled warily and refused to be drawn into what was becoming a rather warm circle.

Later on somebody brought it up again and seeing how uncomfortable it was getting I stepped up in her defense with an explanation that our life journeys have taken us through some stops that have changed our original natures. Someone said it was giving up to let the challenges of life change who you really are and a spirited debate began.

I was first to admit that life had changed me and I was on my guard with everything and everyone. It’s impossible to remain exactly the same after some hard knocks; it’s like scar tissue; it’s rougher than the skin that was damaged. I summed it up as this: everyone has an agenda; I stay on my guard till I know what that agenda is! Not everyone agreed but the beauty of adulthood is mutual respect for one another’s views and perspectives.

Later on,I pondered on the day’s events and tried to dredge up my memory bank for a clear recollection of the event that had taken place in my office but I still couldn’t actually draw up a clear picture.

It was some sort of comfort to find some people had stoutly defended me and while I don’t deny being a bit guarded and reserved I am actually never intentionally hurtful, even when I have every right to be. The only conclusion I drew was that I need to be less absent minded.

I also couldn’t help wondering what changed my old friend from the bubbling teenager to the morose adult I had seen earlier? It’s one thing to be guarded; I judge that to be a fruit of wisdom but it’s another thing to completely shut down and shut out the world.

For a while I stayed in memory lane; remembering the teachers, students, friends and families; not one of us had a clue what the future held back then but whether we admitted it or not, we had all changed; some a lot more happy than others; some a lot more guarded than others..