By DEMOLA AKINYEMI & BOLUWAJI OBAHOPO

An average wife, particularly from southern Nigeria, dreads being a widow because of the unpleasant experiences associated with it.

More often than not, women go into spiritual sessions in mosques, churches and mountains seeking divine protection over their husbands and indeed the family. Perhaps, that is why women are found more in those places of worship than men.

Fears of widowhood stem from the fact women and their children are deprived of the property of the husbands at their death by the extended family.

A cross section of widows at the event.

While many widows live to tell the story after they have found helpers and nurtured the children to greatness,others don’t survive it.

Mrs Yemisi Smart-Adeyemi,wife of a former National President of the Nigerian Union of Journalists and senator representing Kogi West, Prince Smart Adeyemi, had been a victim of widowhood; so she knows where the shoe pinches.

As a teenager, her father, at 50, died, and from there, she knew what it was to be a daughter of a single mother.

Mrs Adeyemi recalled in an interview with journalists how she use†d to take clothes and food items from home, secretly wrapping them and giving them out to widows and the needy in her church.

For the past five years now, Mrs Adeyemi has operated a charity foundation, Manna Dew Foundation, through which she reaches out to widows in Kwara and Kogi states.

The widows, about 200 of them, were carefully selected from churches in the two states and empowered to take care of themselves and the family.

Mrs. Adeyemi, while giving out the end of the year gifts to widows in Ilorin, described their motive for helping widows as an intervention from God, “a sort of divine inspiration”.

Her words,”I have passion for widows. I am also a child of circumstance. My mother is a widow. My father died at 50 years of age. But God saw us through. That notwithstanding, God put in my mind to just have sympathy for widows, especially widows with young children.

“The group was inaugurated on December 8, 2009 in Kwara State, about five years ago. We spend about N10 million every year to organize this in Kogi and Kwara states. And the source of the funds has been through God really, my husband and from our business interests here in Kwara and in Abuja.

“My most exciting moment is that each time I distribute things to them, the sleep I get that day is always different, so deep a sleep. This is money some people take to Dubai and all those places to buy gold and diamond. But I don’t really care about that. Whenever I do this I derive inner satisfaction that I can’t describe”.

She appealed to people to have compassion for widows.

Mrs Smart – Adeyemi

“If you can’t help them, just leave them alone. Bible says whoever showeth mercy will also receive mercy from God. But those who do not show mercy behave harshly to people and it’s not a curse when one says that their own children will suffer it too. So, if you want your children to live good life, when you see people who are in need, if you can’t pity and show them love, leave them alone.”

On her advice to people on philanthropy, she said, “Everyone who has eaten and has leftovers should show love, compassion to other people. You may start in little way with just two people at a time. Whosoever that does not show love does not know God because God is love. This is true love. You see them. They are happy and celebrating. And I pray God to bless a lot of people to be able to do this.”

Widows at the occasion gave testimonies on how the foundation has enabled them to be financially independent and economically empowered to take care of their children’s education and other needs.

One of them, Mrs Awe, described the attention they were getting from Mrs Adeyemi as legendary,showering prayers and praises on her and her husband who was also present.

‘’Without madam, only God knows what would have become of us has been taking good care of us by empowering us on our respective skills, and even helping us whenever we have family problems to attend to. Through her support, we have been able to take care of ourselves and the children’’, she said.

Happiness was boldly written on the widows faces as they departed for their respected homes with gifts. It was indeed a Christmas well celebrated for them.

The highlight of the event was a special prayer session for Mrs Smart Adeyemi and her family by the widow’.