Dear Bunmi, I am a divorced mother of two boys and in my late 40s. I live in a block of flats with another tenant, who lives alone with his seven-year-old daughter.

He never married her mother and now we have fallen hopelessly in love.

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I am 15 years older. But he says he loves me and does not care about the age difference. At first, he thought I was much younger. But, once he got over the shock, he assured me that age does not matter and now we are happy together.

Dear Bunmi, I feel as though I’ve found my soulmate, but my sons hate him. They showed nothing but contempt towards him.

My boys are in their early 20s and say they find it disgusting that I should be sleeping with a man almost their age.

But I don’t care. They don’t live with me. I need you to advise me on what to do, but I assure you, Dear Bunmi, I won’t give this man up without a fight!

Christy, by e-mail.

Dear Christy,

It is obvious from your letter that you’re aware this romance cannot last.

What you have now is what is termed a May/December relationship; a relationship borne out of need and temporary circumstance.

What happens when your man finds a girl he wants to have children with? That you live so close to each other is also not healthy.

Enjoy your fling by all means, but don’t build it into the romance of your life, which it’s not.

Your sons’ resentment is understandable, but they should stand clear of your relationships. Whilst you are at it, keep your options open for a more reassuring relationship. 

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