By Pastor Okokon Ating
In the last edition, we discussed on the types of conflicts and reas-ons why couples exper-ience conflicts. We shall continue to look at some reasons of conflict in marriage:
Lack of communication
Communication is a major factor that unites husband and wife in every home. Lack of communication is the inability of the spouse to discuss together. When there is no communication the home cannot grow.
Lack of sexual satisfact-ion:
This could cause serious conflict between husb-ands and wives. Unusual fights during the night hour between spouses may so-metimes be as a result of refusal of one to satisfy his or her partner sexually.
Dirty habits: It could be a habit of uncleanliness exhibited by either of the couples that irritates the other partner.
Self-ego: The pride of life that makes one to see his or herself better than an-other, this can breed insult and abusive language at home. It is terrible when a woman sees herself has the superior over her hus-band maybe because she is wealthier than her hus-band or maybe she is mo-re opportune than her husband.
Infidelity: This is an act of being unfaithful to your spouse by engaging in ex-tramarital affairs, having other sexual partners.
Betrayal of trust: This is when couples cannot keep family secrete or in-dividual secret to them-selves, when you change from the person your part-ner has always known and admired it causes a brok-en heart and betrayal of trust.
Parental Betrothal or Child Marriage: This is a case where two kids are married to each other by their parents without the kids consent, they only grow up with the know-ledge that they can’t marry any other person both the one betrothed to them.
The couple may lack know-ledge of marital respon-sibility between them-selves. They may be econ-omically handicapped, without natural love bet-ween themselves, when there is no love between a man and a woman defin-itely conflict will ensue.
It is very important that couples should be mind-ful of certain occurrences, attitude and situations in their marriages so that they can use the right medium to settle their conflicts.
People believe that most bad occurrences are caus-ed by spiritual attack from their enemies, they end up spending all their lives in the church for prayers, fasting and deli-verance. Prayers and fast-ing are very good, but we also need to psycholog-ically handle some issues at home.
Women must be very careful about how they delegate responsibilities to their housemaids. When your husband gets used to the maid’s food, your food might not taste well to him any more and when the husband starts com-plaining about the wife’s food after enjoying the maid’s food there will surely be conflict at home.
We can’t completely run away from conflict be-cause it is really inevitable in every home. This is the reason we must learn, no one should be above learning and these teach-ing cannot be over em-phasized.