Wishing all our wonderful fathers, Uncles, Brothers, Grandfathers and other fine gentlemen a happy Father’s Day today. This is for those I have never met, those I aspire to meet, those of you who have made me laugh, cry and reel with excitement. Not forgetting those who have inspired, encouraged, adviced, and prayed for or with me over the years.
What a joy it is to be a Father, a day to remember in the life of every man. Fatherhood a major role for every man who desires it. The moment you step into it it is moments of mixed feelings, overwhelming joy, bouts fears and fantasies.
It is indeed a journey that a man takes without really knowing what lies ahead. I’m sure it must be both a scary expectation as well as thrilling too. Getting married as a man is inevitable once you meet that right person, your soul mate. Yes of course this takes so much from a man from being a life partner to being responsible for bringing life into the world.
Nobody is perfect, no amount of lessons can be sufficient to teach men what to do and how to do it when the time comes or when situations arise. Experience they say is the best teacher, so you can only take a leaf from your own fathers and the fathers, young and old that surround you.
As I let you in on a few Fathering Etiquette Tips that I personally put together, remember they are only guidelines that will enhance, build and propel you to being a better person. Knowledge is power, we should seek to keep ourselves empowered at all times; seek new information, desire to develop our person our polish and our presence.
“ Anyone can be a father, it takes someone special to be dad”
FATHERING ETIQUETTE TIPS
a) Approachable Vs Authoritartin: Some fathers choose either to be approachable and available for their children, which is very much a necessity in today’s world. Let your children love have you around, being approachable means being accessible. Others choose to be very authoritative almost absent but disciplined and strict. Some feel the role of a father is to show that they make all the rules. You will need to strike a positive balance between be authoritave and laying down the rules as well being approachable.
b) Take On board Responsibility:
It is not always going to be a smooth ride, the journey of a father starts wit one step. Once you have made that decision be responsible about it learn tolove your family. You may participate in helping out in and around the home, learn to listen to others and be a provider. If you must help with the the new born baby why not, he/she will not bite, it does not make you any less of a man instead it helps you bond better with the family God gave you.
c)Lead by Example:
Remember you are always being watched, It is better to be admired than to be watched. You are not perfect so are allowed to let your guard down once in a while after all you are only human. However your children and many others that surround you will always watch closely.
d)Watch Your Character Traits:
Another quote I like:
“You lose your property you have lost nothing
“You lose your health you have lost something
“You lose character, you have lost everything”
Show the right attitude at all times as a father even in circumstances where the other person was wrong. Be the more mature person that has an aura of peace, patience, joy and happiness. Have an optimistic view of life even when you are challenged these are the things that build your character.
- e) Quintessential Image:
Your image is everything, the beginning of you creating a good or bad first impression. Whether you are meeting your child’s teacher for the first time, your new boss, a potential client or a distant inlaw how others view you should be your concern. As a father you not only mentor your own children, but the people you work with, your clients, acquaintances, colleagues, staff and subordinates. Your image as a man is everything, avoid being seen as standoffish, proud and unapproachable. Dress the way you want to be addressed at all times for all occassions.
f)Get involved with Education:
Education today has changed as we can see, a lot is being taught and learnt outside the house right in the palm of the hand through technology. It is no more hearsay the internet says it all.
How well do you know your child? Try not be a statistic by guessingthat you know your child when infact you do not. Choose chools early on in life, encourage your childto focus, and talk about career goalls. Be on top of the education journey, be present, be prominent and be prepared.
- f) Evolve with the Times
Our children today are so high-tech we can hardly keep up with them. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and the Likes. What next?
This Z generation are fast taking over the world. I say keep up with the times and don’t be left behind. Let yur children know you are a breast with what is going n around you.
g) Yes is Yes, No is No
As much as you need to be flexible you also need to stand fim on your word. This is how your child will understand a predict you. Avoid grey areas where you can, scold where you need to praise and reward where necessary. Sometimes say Yes when least expected the impact is great.
h) Experience is the Best Teacher
We all want the best for our kids , there will be timeskids need to experience some things themselves. So when you advise and they decide otherwise let them be. Follow the rule experience is the best teacher. At times you can do your best in giving advice and guidelines just hope for the best and pray they will choose the right way.
i) Humour Them
We know you are busy and work takes most of your time, infact you may even be married to your job as the saying goes, watch out for that corporate attitude to life both home and away. You will need to leave room for letting your hair and your guard down. Let your children laugh around you, a great therapy for success. Live and let loose another favourite saying of mine. Crack jokes where you can , or dance a little where you cannot.cut the seriousness once in a while and be a dadnot a man with a chip on his shoulder.
Finally you should have it at the back of your mind to want to leave a good legacy behind for your children both boys and girls. We all have dreams and aspirations that form our daily, weekly and yearly goals. Be a huge inspiration to your children, whether you train, teach, consult, whatever you do let your children have cause to be interested in what you do.
Have a Blessed and Great Fathers Day.