Dear Bunmi,

I’m a secretary in love with her married boss. I’ve worked with him a couple of years now and he’s 21 years older than me. This might sound like a cliche, but I have these gut feelings we have a real connection.

love

Apart from the official lunches we attend together, he also takes me to lunch from time to time. Once or thrice, he’s even taken me to his club for drinks. I don’t want to be responsible for breaking up a marriage, but this looks like my one chance to be happy. I feel more for this man than I have for anyone else in a long time. Do you think I should take the risk and take things further?

Annie, by e-mail

Dear Annie,

Why do you believe this is your one chance of being happy? Are you under the impression there’s a massive shortage of men? It’s true some men do leave their wives for women with whom they live happier lives. But a majority have the affair with their hot, young and eager secretaries, stay married and when the secretary starts to make too much noise about them leaving, fire her and get a new one.

This man hasn’t even said a thing yet about getting it on with you, leaving his wife or even making you a second wife! He isn’t your ‘one chance’ for happiness but a ‘one-way ticket to misery.’ If working with this man is too much temptation, you might be better off  looking for another job.