By Funmi Komolafe
Glory to God for his unlimited mercies upon our lives.
This week, we focus on loneliness. In most cases, one is described as lonely when he or she lacks a companion. God appreciates the fact that we all, at some point in time, need companions.
The evidence of this is found in Genesis 2 verse 18: “ And the Lord God said , ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” ( King James Version).
A person may be lonely if he or she is old enough to get married and desires a marriage partner but is unable to find one. In other words, the person has been in and out of relationships that failed to end up in marriage or has never been in any relationship.
A couple may be lonely if they desire to have children but have been unable to have even one child after several attempts.
For others, it could be because one lost a spouse or he or she has, consciously or unconsciously, become a single parent.
In other instances, it could be that partners are separated by distance.
Whether we admit it or not, at some point in time, we need someone to share our thoughts and feelings with.
However, in our bid to overcome loneliness, there are certain things that a Christian believer must not be associated with.
First, let’s share the thoughts of Pastor Enoch Adeboye in Open Heavens of February 12, 2016.
He wrote, “Loneliness is usually never desired. Prolonged loneliness may sometimes lead to depression”.
Adeboye also made reference to Genesis 2 verse 18 but further explained “help” in the context that it is used in the Bible:
“ Help refers broadly to aid or assistance, the word helper may connote subordinate, but does not necessarily imply inferiority “.
Have you been waiting for a life partner ? Don’t give up. The one that is your bone of your bone is somewhere but you need divine intervention to come together. Therefore, cry to the helper of the helpless for help. Cry to the Lord Jesus. Psalm 121, which you read casually, is so relevant if we pray seriously.
Psalm 121verses 1and 2: “ I will lift up my eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord , which made heaven and earth”.
When we remind the Lord that we have faith that He is our only Helper, he will surely intervene.
Do you know that even with your late marriage, when God intervenes, you can over take your friends who got married before you in several areas.
However, snatching your friend’s lover or husband is not the way to have a marriage partner.
For instance, a single lady, who had been close to a couple, found out that the couple really wanted to have children. She then began to take the woman to all sorts of herbalists in the name of searching for children.
Unknown to madam, this woman had told the herbalist that she wanted to get married to madam’s husband. So, whenever madam used the herbalist’s charm, she and her husband will have clashes that usually got violent.
While this was on, the single lady began to sleep with the husband . Of course with charms made for her by the herbalist. To shorten the story, the single lady got pregnant for madam’s husband . Madam later found out and she was devastated but resolved to stay put.
She vowed never to leave her home for the single lady .
Suddenly , God visited madam and she had a baby boy after years of waiting.
The day the news of madam’s baby birth was broken, the single lady collapsed and was rushed to hospital.
Eventually, the man threw her out of his life. She could not bear the shame , hence she left the country and has been living a lonely life abroad.
Loneliness at home
For married couples, their situation is slightly different. They have each other . Companionship is the essence of marriage. However, the greater companion they need is a child or children.
Psalm 127 verse 3: “ Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord : and the fruit of the womb is his reward”.
The meaning is unambiguous. It is only God that gives children. When IVF succeeds, it is God that allowed it to succeed. Therefore, couples need not put each other under any form of pressure as this could lead to failed marriage if not handled maturely.
Adeboye, in Open Heavens mentioned earlier, stated, “ Every child of God that is determined to fulfill God’s purpose must live according to the order of marriage ordained by the Almighty God. Marriage is the foundation of life according to the Bible. Consequently, marital failure may as well translate to failure in life and ministry”.
Even as couples remain steadfast in prayer, service and worship of the Lord, they must pray against the spirit of immorality.
These days, strange things are happening.
For instance, a couple attended a church believing God for children but the man went into a relationship with a single lady who claimed to have a child for him. I emphasize ‘claimed ’ because experience has shown that in about 95% of those cases, that man is usually not the biological father of that child.
Surprisingly, he brought the child for dedication in the same church. Even some pastors who knew of this unfaithful relationship kept quite.
The man’s wife could not bear it and that led to the collapse of their marriage and her exit from that church.
Whether now or in the nearest future, there would be a repercussion for the man and his strange woman.
The aim of this column is to encourage couples to stay focused and mind the company they keep.
Many of those we share our family secrets with are waiting to take advantage of the situation.
Therefore, our best friend should be the Lord Jesus. He is the friend that never fails.
Testimony begets testimony
As usual, I share the testimony of a couple who remained steadfast and broke through.
Mrs. Yemisi B. married in 2010. After waiting for a year without children coming, she and her husband, like most couples, decided to consult doctors. She was diagnosed with blocked fallopian tubes. She had surgery and waited for two years, yet pregnancy was not achieved. She then suggested that her husband should have a check. Let’s thank God for husbands who listen to their wives without having a feeling of control. He did and was told he had low sperm count.
According to Yemisi, she was listening to the testimony of women who brought their babies for testimony on Laughter Day at Laughter Foundation Christian Ministry when the Spirit of God mentioned to her: “ If God can do this, yours is possible”.
The good news is that, after six years of waiting, she is now a mother of twins: a boy and a girl.
I decided to share this woman’s testimony to enable us appreciate that listening to testimonies isn’t a waste of time.
One can key into a testimony prayerfully. While praying, all that expectant women or couples need do is to remind God that since He did it for Mr. and Mrs. X,Y,Z , He can do it for them too.
Use this as a regular prayer point and the Lord that visited Sarah, the Lord that visited Hannah , the unchangeable changer will step in to change your situation and give you a joyful home.
Remember, remain focused in payer and watch the company you keep.