By Debbie Olujobi

Who should I  say sent me?  Tell them the “I am” sent you! I don’t know many people who would go deliver a people enslaved by an evil dictator from oppression by a God whose name is “I am”. I’d compare the pharaoh in the times of the biblical Moses to Idi Amin (ruthless dictator of Uganda) or even more recently the late Mohamar Gaddafi.

On the surface, if you take away the undertone of the supernatural; it’s actually quite preposterous!! A poor shepherd, wanted fugitive, walking into the Egyptian equivalent of the white house demanding the release of the labour work force of the pyramids; I’d class that to be a first grade suicide mission. He did go though, a few signs and wonders helped but he did go and the rest is Biblical history.

A lot of things can be gleaned from the life of Moses. He was the baby rescued from a watery grave and Pharaoh’s executioners.  Saved by a princess and lived a royal life of privilege till he was forty. At that age, he kills an Egyptian and flees Egypt to become a shepherd in Midian and he lives the life of “a has been” for the next forty years; from grace to grass is painful and lonely.

At 80 when he has reconciled himself to his failed life; a voice starts talking from a bush that is on fire but not consumed! I am sure he would have started doubting his own sanity then but luckily for him it’s actually God and not the onset of schizophrenia. From then on he starts a new life, moulded by the “I am” and the promise of the greatness delayed is finally fulfilled.

Lately I have come across quite a few people having what I now call their Midian experience. They like Moses have shown great promise in their lives; they have all the traits and even qualifications for greatness but for some reason the dots are not connecting. It is frustrating to be stuck in a never ending rut and feel like life is passing you by. I have felt that way many times in my life and only grace and my deep faith and conviction that the tide always turns pulls me through.

Life is a continuous journey; we go from place to place some happier than some. It doesn’t help that we live in a world that judges and alienate rather than celebrate. It is particularly difficult for ladies who are of a marriageable age who are still single; even worse for those who are married and yet to have children.

The world likes labels; those nearest and dearest will hang the labels of spinster and barren a bit nicer than outsiders but they will label. It’s like every good thing they have to say is followed by a “but”. She is very pretty; has a good job but still single is a good example and after a while even their well-meaning concern and pity feels like a nail being driven into one’s heart.

It would be a gross understatement to say only women have it rough; judgement is not limited to gender or status. It’s a general plague that troubles everyone and it brings me back to Moses. His “but” situation or should I say Midian experience lasted 40 years and I wonder how many other shepherds would have felt the need to put him in his place.

I can imagine the taunts of “ I hear you used to be a prince and lived in palace”. I dare say he would have been jeered and called shepherd prince or animal prince many times just like some of us have been called spinster, barren, jobless, poor and failure severally. I was asked to give a talk in a gathering of singles a while back and during the question and answer session I was asked a particular question that summed up my point this week. It was simple and some may have even considered it rude.

“Don’t you feel like a failure for being single at your age? Is your success the trade-off for marriage?”
There had been an audible gasp in the auditorium and I had to brush off the moderator’s apologies. It was a legitimate question and I decided it was worth an answer. The truth was while I had my challenges, I didn’t feel like a failure; I went on to emphasise that I also didn’t let anyone make me feel like a failure.

I couldn’t deny that I wanted every girl’s dream of marriage and a family but I hadn’t written myself off; it would happen in time and it did. That’s the entire point most of us don’t get from Moses’s experience at the burning bush. Moses’s life up till then was not a failure because it was not over.

Like God we also are an ever evolving being; we are; you are, I am, she is, he is!! I remember telling them that being single is just a stop out of the many stops in life’s journey; it would not define me! I am an ever evolving story; a yet uncompleted journey so failure is a judgement only God can make.

I left that gathering with the echo of many “I ams’”. I had encouraged everyone to label themselves in the present; they weren’t dead yet so their journey wasn’t over. I am alive is a great label, I am healthy, I am a wife, I am a sister, mother, employed, brother, friend and so many other things. These days I am many things but mostly I am very thankful for all that I am.