“All hope abandon, ye who enter here”. Alighieri Dante, 1265-1321.

Note: Last week, the first part of this column was titled ICPC vs Tinubu. The error was the fault of my assistant who thought I meant ICPC instead of CCB. And, I was in too much pain to check what was sent to the Editor. The error is deeply regretted. Dele.

If you hope to see the end of this case you must have more than nine lives. It will most probably outlast the life of this administration and distract its attention for as long as it lasts. You can bet on that!

The opening rounds, in what promises to be a long-drawn out slugfest, between Asiwaju Bola Tinubu and the Federal Government; ill-advised by the Attorney-General and Minister of Justice, started as anyone with street wisdom, (seriously lacking in government circles but readily available at UniJankara), could have predicted. A truckload of Senior Advocates of Nigeria, SANs, appeared for the “accused”; one lone member of the same tribe of legal dignitaries held fort for the government.

The lone sacrificial lamb by government tried to pin an amended charge on Asiwaju, perhaps deliberately, knowing full well that the defence team would oppose the motion for the accused to make a plea on a charge made just the day before. It was a pathetic ploy coming from a SAN.

Predictably, it failed. At the end of the day, the case was adjourned; meaning it has not moved a step beyond where it was when government first decided to prosecute. Only a blockhead can fail to see the battle plan for the defence. They intend to wear down government with technicalities. At this point, let me add “a bloody waste of public funds” to the charge against government on this needles venture.

Hundreds of millions of naira will eventually be wasted on the prosecution of this case by both sides on account of discovering 16,500 pounds or N4.3 million or so in someone’s account when it is also true that the money was not stolen from the public purse. One knowledgeable individual informed me that to engage a senior SAN, such as the Federal Government has hired, you start with N10 million as deposit.

And they add charges as they go along!! By the time this thing is over, the country might have spent over N100 million and generated over 100,000 pages of legal print out which no sane person will ever want to read. If you don’t believe me, just find out how many pages have already been produced. Then you will understand how senseless the whole thing is.

The outline of defence is already clear. First, they will contest every word and sentence on every charge. Then, they will dispute jurisdiction of the Abuja court since the alleged offence was not committed in Abuja but in Lagos. Each and every single point can be argued all the way to the Supreme Court as a matter of the fundamental human rights of an accused person. Need I go further to explain to the block heads that started this rigmarole that it is a mission leading nowhere? Certainly, this case will consume millions of naira in a country where every kobo of public expenditure should be spent for productive purposes not for political frivolities. Irrespective of its legal or constitutional merits, this is top grade economic foolishness……

WE ARE DOOMED !!! –2

“0803-682-0306

Sir, thank you. Man U, Barca et al, wil kill education in Naija. Delta Gov has provided TV @ roundabouts to make the death painless. In 20 years time, the disaster will erupt. Politicians a the undertakers. It’s a shame”.

Several weeks ago, I read in an interview Olisa Agbakoba, SAN, former President of Nigerian Bar Association, stating that he has no regrets that all his kids are girls. Mine are also all girls. Agbakoba has only given partial thanks to the Almighty. It is possible that when University of Ibadan first started, the ratio was about 10:1, male to female students. In a few years time, the ratio will most probably be reversed.

Given the trend we observe today, the university, any university, of the future in Nigeria will be lucky to have any male students – if admissions are based on merit. Our boys simply no longer have time for reading any more. Granted the girls also fall prey to their own distractions. They talk too much and too long on the phone and spend career killing hours on the facebook. But they, for the most part, have escaped the boys’ addiction to European football.

Again, back in 1962, any of our classmates felt ashamed if challenged by a colleague on anything in our School Cert syllabus and he could not provide the correct answer. Today, the first topic for discussion when boys meet at school on Monday morning is football. Woe to the fellow who does not know if it was Rooney or Messi who scored the winning goal and how it was scored.

Today, it is irrelevant if you know anything about Biology, English Literature or Mathematics; being the expert on footballers is everything. Is this the foundation on which we are going to build the future?

On one, to me, BLACK Sunday in August 2011, the football broadcasts started by 12 noon and continued until 2 a.m. All the boys in the neighbourhood, including those registered for this year’s examinations, were glued to television sets from start to finish; and there was school to attend the next day!

It is quite possible that the foreign inventors of these distractions did not include enslaving our kids as part of their marketing agenda; but they have succeeded in achieving that as an extra dividend beyond their wildest dreams. How on earth will our kids close the technology gap when they no longer have the time to study the basic sciences and mathematics which underlie these inventions? Professor Wole Soyinka, a master wordsmith, called his and mine “the wasted generation”.

I find it difficult to disagree. Perhaps somebody will please ask Prof to tell us what to call the next generation. One thing is clear, however. Unless parents and governments can find a way out of this trap, the losers of tomorrow have already been sold into slavery. God help us!!!

WHAT ARE YOU SIR?

“I am not a lion, I am not also a general….”

President Goodluck Jonathan

We know what you are not, but can you tell us what you are? Will it be correct to say you are confused? Or perhaps out of your depth because, in fact, you never had much experience running anything until you became president in 2011? Tell us, sir.

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