By Debbie Olujobi
Most animals shed skin at regular intervals and we regenerate new ones. In humans the process is rather unceremonious and happens all the time but not so in reptiles. When I was younger I had seen a lizard in the process of shedding skin and had been riveted.

I had initially thought it got caught in some dirty gauze before I realised it was actually ridding itself of its old skin and revealing a new layer that was younger  and I guess more attractive to fellow lizards. Later on I had seen documentaries showing other reptiles doing same and the visual imagery is something I find to be compelling when describing the process of human evolution.

I guess the Biologists will attribute the necessity of shedding skin to the natural growth processes; we get bigger and of course the daily wear and tear means one skin can’t last a life time.  Recently I have experienced what I would call an emotional growth surge and part of the consequence of that is an emotional shedding of dead skin; by dead skin I am referring to the emotional baggage and dumbbells I have acquired over the years.

In  sports, adding weight to a movement is only useful where we wish to expend more energy and perhaps burn fat. Adding weights otherwise is unnecessary and can even cause a sprain of muscles and damage to other parts of an otherwise fit physical form.

A world class athlete may add ankle or wrist weights to his body when he is training for competition but he would be insane not to take them off when it is time for the competition proper. Bearing excess weight in rehearsals is fine but when you want to break world records and run the race of your life, you need to be as light as possible, that’s how you glide with the wind and come out the champion.

Reality is much like a race and the dumb bells and excess baggage may be alright in our formative periods but they have to be discarded when we become formed. They come in the shape of family and even well-meaning friends; their opinions, inclusions and counsel.

Reality is often a no rehearsal event and some events will not give us a second chance to run without the weights. When we take the starting position for our race, we need to be sure that all excess weight and baggage are discarded. Failure because we tried our best but fell short is bad enough; failure because we carried dead weight that was unnecessary is a lot more painful and can only end in bitterness and disillusionment.

Adulthood is a time for independence and where necessary an amputation of unnecessary attachments and appendages if need be. If you agree with me then our position begs 3 questions, firstly when do we really grow? Secondly what is the gauge of the growth; numbers or maturity? Finally can we truly re-invent ourselves as an island if need be?

To the first question my answer is simple; growth is a continuing process that never ends; so judgement is at best the evidence of our reality. Secondly number is definitely not the right gauge of growth and maturity is at best measured by our emotional ambience; so my answer will be measured maturity.

The final question is in my opinion the most profound and it centres on the establishment and discovery of personal truth. At a particular time in all our lives we make peace with whom and what we are, that gives us the right and even privilege to make an absolute or conscious choice to be an island if need be.

It would be the time to shed the dead skin and reveal the new skin that can only come out when we recognise growth as the only destination.

In the past week, I have surprised myself by the ease at which I was able to shed the dead skin that had overstayed its welcome, emotionally, spiritually and emotionally. I am one of those individuals’ who can be ultra-sensitive but feisty. I don’t like fights and confrontations but like most people anger can always trigger an angry response when I feel threatened.

I was pleasantly surprised to find that when I was put in a situation where hell literary broke loose around me, I remained calm. I did recognise that my position may have been hurtful and a tad disappointing for those involved but my epiphany was watching myself apologising for their hurt feelings but not backing off from my position.

Decisions that concern and affect me in my opinion should be left to me; pussy footing and political correctness is carrying dead weight in the race of my life and won’t help me glide with the wind. Because my decisions are based on fundamental truths I am willing to be my very own island if need be; you see I have decided to sail towards the light; leaving all heaviness behind.

It’s a new feeling; unruffled and uncluttered; very light!! Like that lizard I saw so many years ago; I will leave the dead skin behind.