By JOSEPHINE IGBINOVIA
To support rape victims and also provide ideas on how rape could be prevented, she passionately set up Tender Hearts Family Support Initiative many years ago. Pastor(Mrs.) Taiwo Iredele Odubiyi, a woman famous for ministering on relationships, is also a prolific writer who has to her credit over 20 books, notably inspirational romance novels and children literature.

She is also the author of Rape & How to handle, a book that has been translated into Yoruba.  Pastor Taiwo is the Senior Associate Pastor, alongside her husband Reverend Sola Odubiyi, at The Still Waters Church International in Lagos. Here’s a chat Vista Woman had recently with this award-winning writer who is also the Founder of Pastor Taiwo Odubiyi Ministries.

Enjoy!

Why do you seem to be very concerned about rape?

I first mentioned rape in my novel,Love on the Pulpit,and because of the response I was getting from the public, I mentioned it again in Tears on my Pillow. Then, someone called me on phone to say she was raped first by her uncle whom she was living with in a family house, and some weeks after, she was raped again by a cousin in the same house.

*Taiwo

Weeks after, her own blood brother was about to rape her but did not succeed because someone came in. I never thought rape was that prevalent until I began to receive calls since I founded TenderHearts Family Support Initiative.

The truth is that rape is terribly prevalent in our society, especially in remote areas and villages, but people do not easily want to talk about it. Someone was here a few weeks ago to tell me that she was raped. A week before that, someone also came all the way from Ife to confide in me because she felt she couldn’t talk to anyone else, including her parents.

I however encouraged her to also include her parents. Since I started TenderHearts Family Support Initiative, I’ve been going round primary and secondary schools, campuses, organizing seminars, etc. to teach people about preventing, identifying, and also handling rape. We also enlighten parents on tell-tale signs that would help them know if their child has been sexually abused.

So far, how would you access the response of most parents to rape?

Most parents do not actually know how to handle rape, and that is where we come in. Most of them feel despair and are also overwhelmed and shattered. Some of them believe that maybe the child invited it, one way or the other. But I try to make them understand that no woman in her right mind will ask to be raped. A lot of parents really need to learn to believe their children if we must tackle the issue of rape.

If the rape has happened already, the child should be given adequate support and taken to a counselor and a hospital as well to enable him or her overcome the trauma.   But how about taking up legal actions since rape is classified as a criminal act?

That may be necessary, but for me as a pastor, I see rape from another angle. Of course, the rapist has to be dealt with because it is obvious that whoever he is, something must be wrong with him. As a pastor, I believe rapists need moral and psychological help.

Thus, I am always ready to help by getting such persons retrace their steps, repent, and adopt measures that will prevent them from engaging in the act any further. I went to a secondary school and because the girls could not come out to talk about their experiences, I asked that they put them into writing.

Among the sheets I received, a girl wrote that her mother is never around and that her father has been sleeping with her for years. She has even aborted three times for her father! Immediately I read that, I announced, pleading that the writer should come see me. I waited, but she never showed up. I went back to the school another day, asking that the girl reveal herself, but she still didn’t.

I imagine everyday what that young girl is going through! So, for such a father, it is obvious that he has a loose bolt in his head. No father in his right senses will even allow his own daughter go through a single abortion not to mention three! I would have done everything in my power to remove that girl from the situation if she showed up.

But how possibly can you remove such a victim from her violator, considering the fact that it happens to be her own father?

In such cases, we liaise with the school authority and other members of the victim’s family to remove the victim from the situation.

Do you have any shelter where you take them to?

Not yet. Rape happens a lot at home like I’ve mentioned in my novels. Most of the time, the perpetrators of rape are known people such as family members, friends, etc. If it’s at home, the victim either has to be removed from the house or the rapist has to be sent away if possible.

Where it’s by a stranger who cannot be pinpointed, the victim just has to be properly counseled and examined medically. As much as possible, I tell ladies to avoid walking alone at nights and in secluded places, and to always be careful.

What else does TenderHearts Family Support Initiative do?

Apart from enlightening people about rape, we also reach out to women and children around us, including physically challenged children.

Back to your books: as a busy woman, where do you get the time to put together such romantic novels?

There is a saying that where there is a will, there will always be a way. Writing is something I’m passionate about; particularly in the area of relationship. When it’s time for me to write, I sit down to do that and when it’s time to attend to my husband, I put my laptop and writing materials aside.

Also, when I’m with my children, I make them know I am with them, and we sit down to watch TV together and sometimes we dance together. So far, I’ve published 10 romance novels. Meanwhile, I have two that are ready and will be in the market by April 2012.

They are Too Much of a Good Thing and My First Love. I also have four story books for children, and then several other books for couples and singles, including my Rape & How To Handle It. I will actually be marking my 10th writing anniversary later this year, and I hope to do so by publishing five books within the year. The books are however ready, but need financial support to be published (Laughs).