I bet you don’t get to write about people like me, but there are plenty of us in this country, especially in Lagos where I operate. 

I am a married woman with children. My husband lost his job over four years ago and hasn’t been able to find another one.

In the meantime, the flat will have to be paid for along with the kids’ school fees. 

Before I got married, I used to go with a group of girls to all these fancy parties, where going home with any man with cash to burn was the objective.

By a stroke of luck, I ran into a couple of ‘friends’ from those days and, soon, resumed the nights out. I am a nurse and find it easy to lie to my husband about working nights on overtime, so I could get more cash.

He would welcome any excuse to have money to spend himself, and I have this sneaky feeling that as long as I bring in the money, he might not be interested in looking for a job.

He doesn’t know what I’m up to at nights and it would break his heart if he finds out. I don’t enjoy what I do and would love to stop.

Joanne, by e-mail.

Dear Joanne,

Who says you have to be a prostitute to shoulder the financial responsibilities that belong to you and your husband?

It’s true that all the money you’re making is to get the rents paid and clear the kids’ school fees, but at what cost?
You don’t have to put yourself through the humiliation of sleeping with different men to make life easier for your family. Give up the sleazy job right away, even if it means not having all the things you wish for your family. If you’re broke, your man will pull up his socks.
Sit down with him and make him face facts. You need to work together to make the family happy, without exposing yourself and your husband to the dangers of STDs and AIDS.