Dear Bunmi,

Two years ago, my boyfriend moved in with me and my two children from a previous marriage.

He got on well with the children and things seemed to be going well, until a few months ago when he told me he would rather be on his own.

I was surprised. When I pressed him further, he said friends and relations of his didn’t like the fact he was living off a woman, in spite of the fact he helped a lot financially.

Now he comes to visit a few days a week and sometimes stays the night. I want him to move back in, but he says he really prefers things the way they are. I don’t know where I now stand and neither do the children.

Bukola, by e-mail.

Dear Bukola,

I think your man is trying to have a clean break by gradually easing out of the relationship. Why don’t you set him a time limit? Tell him to keep away from you for this period, so he can see what it’s like not to have you around.

After that, he has a choice – family or the single life. If he can’t commit to you 100 per cent, walk away and don’t go back on your decision.

Children need stability, not a man who’s nothing more than a big baby himself. I hope things work out. If they don’t, be wary of who you introduce your kids to in future.

Vanguard News Nigeria