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He doesn’t care for safe sex

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Absence doesn’t necessarily make the heart grow fonder

Dear Bunmi,

My partner and I are in our 40s. He is married and I am separated from my husband. Since my separation, he has been supportive emotionally and financially, and I care for him in my own way. You see, I have since discovered him to be a chronic womaniser and I am afraid of contracting any sexual disease.

I have told my partner of my fears and urged him to use the condom whenever we make love.

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He has bluntly refused to do this. He said he would happily accept any pregnancy, and I have no doubt that he would, though that is not the issue. He shuts me up whenever I bring up the subject of condoms. How can I make him use it?

Felicia, by e-mail.

Dear Felicia,

Some men can’t stand the sight of the condom, and no threat of STD would make them wear one.

Your partner is obviously one of them. I’m afraid you can’t force him to wear one.

So, it is up to you to stay with his decision or look for another partner who shares the same belief about protective sex as you.

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