Dear Bunmi,

Two months ago, I called it quits with my boyfriend who constantly embarrassed me with his excessive jealousy and violence. Unfortunately, I discovered that I was pregnant.

In the meantime, my ex has found a new girlfriend…who is also pregnant for him. I’ve had a word with her about my pregnancy and she agreed that our man should take responsibility for both pregnancies.

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The snag is, I want him to settle with me, instead of her. How do I go about this?

Uju, by e-mail.

Dear Uju,

It’s vitally important for a baby to have a father around. But in this situation, you and the other woman shouldn’t be fighting to keep this ‘Jack-the-lad’ of yours because, by the sound of it, anything would be better than living with him.

He’s no good and violent. The speed with which he got another girl pregnant within weeks of leaving you is mind-boggling.

Even if you could make a relationship with him work, it would be harmful to your child to be around such a person. Let his new woman know what she’s letting herself in for, and if she wants him. In spite of that, it’s no skin off your nose.

You need to walk away now before you get into deeper emotional problems.