Dear Bunmi,

I recently broke up with my girlfriend after I was violent towards her. After a while, we agreed there could be a way back to resurrecting the relationship and are willing to try.

The problem is her dad. He was very furious that I was violent towards his daughter and now I don’t know how to repair the damage I have caused to her father who even now, I had a great respect for.

How can I approach him, or have I lost any relationship we must have dad in the past for good?

Paul, By e-mail.

Dear Paul,

You obviously are ashamed of your behaviour and want to make a fresh start. Unfortunately, you can’t regain someone’s trust in a moment. Think how you would feel if someone battered your daughter.

It’ll take a lot of hard work to show you have changed. But at the moment it’s not about him. Convince his daughter you’ve changed and that it will not happen again.

There’s a chance she could then have a word with her dad and he may come round. But have you sort counselling?