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I was her one-night stand

Dear Bunmi,

I am happily married with children. Early in the year, this lovely lady joined the company I worked for. She is a computer analyst and is sexy, witty and intelligent.

We are good friends and I know her fiance.

A couple of months ago, she had a party in her house and I stayed behind to help her set up as her man was out of town. One thing led to another and we made love.

It was fantastic and I instantly fell in love with her.

She, however, made it clear that it was a one-night stand and that she is very much in love with her fiance.

My problem now is that I just can’t stop thinking about her and our love-making.

I long to touch her. I’m not really the promiscuous type and I thought what I had with my wife was good. But it was magic with this girl. Although she says it’s over, I cannot bear the thought that I’ll never make love to her again.

Donatus, by e-mail.


Dear Donatus,

It is a fact that we are all programmed by nature to fancy a variety of potential lovers but you are now married and your oats-sowing days are over. As much as you are infatuated with this girl, you must let her go to make her commitment to her fiance work. Don’t deceive yourself; you’ve had your fling, now put it behind you.

She is not romantically interested in you and the earlier you faced this fact, the better for your peace of mind. Cherish the friendship you have by all means, but accept the fact that she no longer wants you, and move on.

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