Dear Bunmi,

My husband has got the reputation of being his office Romeo. Last year, he had an affair with a woman at work which was so public that I got to hear of it.

That really broke my heart but he said it was nothing, that he was not prepared to give up our marriage and our children for an affair. He promised it wouldn’t happen again. But it has!

 

Towards the end of last year, I got a phone call that two women in the office actually fought over him and they were suspended. When I asked him to change jobs, he said he liked what he does and getting a good job at his age was almost impossible. He’s 48 and it seems he values life at the office better than the life we lead at home.

Bola,

by e-mail.

Dear Bola,

It’s not surprising that your husband loves his job so much. It sounds as if he’s living every single man’s dream – working his way through the female members of staff. But isn’t he forgetting something? He has a wife and children at home who love and need him. Your husband is a selfish man and you have every right to feel betrayed and upset. But how many chances are you prepared to give to him? As long as he knows he can talk you round to forgiving his greed, he won’t put a stop to it.

Unfortunately, the problem isn’t work, it’s your husband. Even if he left his job, he’d probably cheat again. Men like him never change. Short of getting out of the relationship whilst you still have your pride, I’m afraid you have to accept his recklessness with women and learn to share him!