By Pastor Okokon Ating
One of the challenges is when a woman is unable to reach orga-sm or is orgiastic ally dys-functional.
Considering the above men-tioned challenges as related to women sexually, several reasons might have been the cause. The reasons may include: Marital disharmony;Emotional stress due to en-vironmental factors; Igno-rance about sexual matters or guilt and shame about sex-uality; Illness which may be psychological such as dep-ression and the effect of drugs used to treat certain illness.
The matters discussed abo-ve need the serious attent-ion of the couples who found themselves in such situation. Let them examine those challenges carefully by themselves and resolve them promptly, in order to avoid a breakup in marriage.
Couples who agreed during courtship to have a joint account should strictly adhere to it. That is, there should be financial discipli-ne. The husband, head of the family, has the right to consult his spouse on finan-cial matters.
One of the things that tear apart many marriages is when one partner feels cheated in the area of fi-nance. In a family where both partners are salary earners, there is the need for them to plan their expenses according to their income per month. Guarding against financial unfaithfulness is necessary if they want to keep their marriages intact and lively.
On the other hand, if both spouses are salary earners, traders or business men/woman but choose not to put their income together, perhaps due to selfish rea-sons or unnecessary advice from friends and parents for the fear of one overshad-owing the other, it would be fair if there is a project account for school fees, vehicle maintenance, house keep or rent, PHCN bills or any other important project that will demand huge exp-enses like the acquisition of a landed property or building, where it will be needful for corporate contributions in order to carry out those pro-jects.
Despite the fact that they have no joint account, I adv-ise that couples should try to open what I may call “One-hand or family project account”, where both will be paying in certain percentage of their monthly earning for equal problem solving in the family for example, caring for both parents, education of siblings or unexpected ass-istance to both families. The Bible affirms of oneness of the husband and wife and I believe in the biblical injun-ction that it is good for cou-ple to put everything in one purse as stated earlier. This is to avoid sentiments and gap creation in marriage.
We know very well that in African context, child bear-ing is a crucial factor imme-diately one gets married. That an average African wo-man should marry within the space of one to two years without pregnancy is an invitation questions of all types from in-laws. The mindset of the people will question:
- Who or what is the cause for the delayed conception?
- What is the plan of the couple as to how many years would they remain before they start thinking of child bearing?
- Is the problem from the husband or wife?
Often times, it is common in African to attribute the blame to the woman who has not been pregnant, as if the woman is to get preg-nant without the semen from the husband. There is a lack of knowledge con-cerning finding corporate solution medically Couples should learn to try medical examination before they draw conclusion or accuse anybody as responsible.
*For enquiries contact:
Pastorating@gmail.com Apostolic Church, 3, Tree Power Avenue, Itire, Lag-os. Or call: Pastor Okokon Ating on: