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Raped by my ex!

 

Dear Bunmi,

For 18 months, Greg and I had a very strong relationship and the sex was great.

Unfortunately, and for no reason, I fell out of love with him and had to break things off.

He was really devastated in spite of the fact that I let him down as gently as I  could because he was very nice to me.

I’m now in another relationship and happy. Some few weeks ago, I met Greg at  a lecture and he invited me to his flat for a drink. Since we both remained good  friends, I went with him.

He told me he had a few girlfriends and I was genuinely happy for him. I’d

scarcely touched my drink when he was all over me. I was shocked. He pinned me to  the couch and started having sex with me and hurting me in the process. I asked him  to stop several times, but he didn’t until I was able to free my hands and grab him  round the throat to get him off.

He showed no remorse whatsoever and had the guts to tell me I shouldn’t find  lovemaking with him so repulsive since we were once lovers.

He still wants us to be friends. What I can’t understand is why a man who was once a gentleman could turn into a brute.

Taiye, bye-mail.

Dear Taiye,

By going with your ex to his flat knowing both of you would be alone must have  sent the wrong signal to him. You did the dumping and he obviously hasn’t forgiven  you for that.

It is important that you get this emotional trauma behind you and be wary next  time you decide to go to any single man’s apartment alone – especially if sex might be  on the cards.

What happened to you is not uncommon – but that doesn’t make it right. Your ex obviously wanted to hurt you as much as he was hurt when you dumped him. But he  went about things the wrong way. He’s the brute, not you and you should put a lot of  distance between you.


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