I CURRENTLY live with my boyfriend of 10 months and I never thought he would cheat on me – I know we love each other deeply. But he recently came back from a three- week course where he said he got friendly with a female delegate from another company.
I thought nothing of this but, one night, I caught him in the toilet sending a text message.
He flushed the toilet to distract me, but when I looked at his mobile when he was having a bath, I saw he’d just sent a suggestive text to this woman.
When I confronted him, he swore nothing happened between them – he’s even keen on going ahead with our wedding plans. I feel as if I can’t ever trust him again.
Janette, by e-mail.
The only way you can trust your man again is if you can be sure he’ll never
misbehave again. And the only way to be sure he doesn’t is to find out why he
misbehaved in the first place and make sure those reasons don’t come up again. So, why did he text this course mate? Was he bored? Feeling trapped? Was he flattered by her attentions? Or maybe he panicked that he isn’t attractive to women apart from you!
You need to have a heart-to-heart with your man and not one where you scream at him! Listen to him. Find out what’s really going on in his mind about you both.
Then you’ll know whether you can create a relationship in which he’ll be faithful in future.