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She’s black-mailing me!

DearBunmi,

I have a three-year-old son by my previous girlfriend. I broke up with his mother because she was always violent and refused to further her studies.

I now have a woman that I’m compatible with and we intend to get married soon. But since she got to know about this, my ex has refused to let the boy stay with me from time to time as he used to.

He said I might not give him back and talking to her is always stressful. My son is adorable and I want the best for him, but only if his mother would let me.

Okoye by e-mail.

DearOkoye,

Sadly, a lot of unmarried fathers lose touch with their children when relationship breaks down. Unfortunately, such fathers don’t have legal right to their son’s upbringing no matter how much maintenance they are paying.

The best you can do is to keep being friendly with her so that in time she may get rid of her suspicious fear that you want to take the child away from her.

As you start a new family with your new love, your ex might be more confident in letting her son see more of you.


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