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Coming To Terms With Your Husband’s Limitations!

LUST will always find a way! It is no news that after years of marriage. and a couple of children. some couples’ sex lives almost grind to a halt. It becomes boring to the point of being non-existent and when your man’s libido was ‘bearable’ at the inception of your courtship. ‘frustrating’ is what it is at this stage of the marriage. ‘The scenario is almost always the same every night:’ said Ruth, an optician, whilst commenting on the state of her marriage. “Dan, my husband would be walking around in his boxers as I took in his lovely figure and felt a pang of longing. I moved towards him, smacking his still tight bum and what did I get? ‘Not tonight darling. I’m knackered!’

“I was just over 40. and Dan, my husband, a couple of years older. We’d been married for over 15 years and 1 wish I could say our sex life had just steadily calmed down over the years. But the truth was that it had never really been anything to write home about. To look at his taunt body, you’d think he was fantastic in bed. But he had the lowest

sex drive of anyone I’d ever known. Basically, he was a once-a-month- in-the-missionary-position kind of guy. I don’t think he’d even known what foreplay was.

“I’d tried to perk things up. You know, the usual way – sexy undies, romantic meals – nothing too kinky. But Dan was a prude. Thongs and sexy undies totally horrified him. So over the years, I’d accepted the situation, thanking my stars for the three kids we had. But now our last child was in boarding school, there were no activities to mask the frustration any longer. I tried to fool myself that he just needed a bit of coaxing. So, when next he came into the bathroom when I was having a shower, I tried to drag him in with me, but he fled muttering excuses.

“I was so frustrated that I confided in my closest friend. She suggested all the things I already tried before telling me 1 could use the services of her electrician. Was she nuts? ‘He’s not actually an electrician: my friend said, ‘But Muri has one of these tokunbo vans that still have the foreign trade marks and addresses on them. If he calls at your place, he’ll look like a tradesman on official duty. He’s a friend of my bit-on- the-side, and believe me, he looks better than my bloke. He’d hinted he wants a mature woman as a friend. You know what, let him come over, so you could assess him.’

“How desperate was I to settle for a total stranger’s visit? But my friend said he was meeting me on my turf and if I didn’t like him, I could shove him out. On the day of my first ‘date’, I felt a pang of guilt as I left my private practice early for home. Shortly after, a funny- looking van pulled up. When the bell went. I was so curious I quickly opened the door. And. there was this stocky balding man laughing as he introduced himself. My husband beats him in the looks department, hands down, Suddenly, sleeping with him didn’t look all that inviting.

‘I’m really sorry,’ I stammered, I need to rush back to work – an emergency.’ But he just made his way into the sitting room, produced a bottle of wine and two glasses from his fake ‘tool bag’ and handed me a glass. ‘At one o’clock in the afternoon?’ I spluttered.

“He just laughed, opened the wine and poured. I had to laugh at his cheek. And there was I. a respectably married woman, drinking wine with a gigolo in my matrimonial home! Well, I didn’t need to actually have sex. We could just talk, couldn’t we? But as the alcohol went to my head, I found myself wondering what he was like in bed. He might not be the most handsome of men. but his enthusiasm and sense of humour were catching. I found myself feeling quite turned on. The thought that I was in control, and calling the shot meant I could decide     when and how we did the deed!

“He moved towards me. and within minutes, we were undressing each other. As his hands had a free reign on my body, I hesitated. I was actually going to be unfaithful but then he lay me back on the sofa and continued to expertly caress me. He was amazing. He knew exactly what to do! And, the experience was an incredible one. I have no idea how long we made love – or how many different positions we did it in, all I know is that, by the time he left. I’d never been so satisfied in my life. Meeting at home was a bit risky. so we started meeting in not-too expensive hotels and I happily paid.

“Muri has now been a sort of permanent fixture in my life. He gives me mind-boggling sex and I lavish him with presents. I’ve been a considerable help in his business, too, but believe me. all these are nothing compared with the lift his being in my life has given me. It’s not exactly how I want things to be. I’d rather it was Dan who made love to me all over the house. But the reality is, my husband is just not like that. So, I have Muri instead. And, because I’m no longer frustrated, our marriage is all the better for it!



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