Dear Bunmi,

My current girlfriend wants sex every night and I don’t keep up.I have these feelings she’s a nymphomaniac. We’ve been together a couple of months and there is no sign her ardor is slowing down.

Love-gone-sour
Love-gone-sour

It’s great to have a woman who is so into me but I’m finding it hard to keep up with her demands. Sometimes it’s difficult to get an erection and I’m even wondering whether men can fake an orgasm like women do.

Segun, by e-mail

Dear Segun,

Looks as if your body is struggling to keep up with your woman’s nightly demands and this is not a surprising sign. Everybody is entitled to a night off and you need to give your body a little love and attention too.

Most relationships start with a passionate few months. But eventually you need to settle into a routine where sex fits in with the rest of your life. This doesn’t mean you fall out of love with your partner – quite the opposite.

Part of the function of so much initial sex may be to condition the brain to your new lover. It’s been proved that when you have sex, two hormones are released – oxytocin and vasopressin – which are thought to form strong and deep emotional bonds between you. If these bonds are strong enough, you should be able to cut back the time you spend having sex.

But that’s where the problem lies. What is satisfying to one person may not be to the other. It’s possible your girlfriend’s demands are due to feelings of insecurity about your relationship. If so, making her feel secure will allow your relationship to settle.

I don’t think you should worry too much about erection failure. If you’re attempting sex that frequently then the problems could be your body’s way of asking for a rest.

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