Dear Bunmi,

About a year ago, my younger brother told me he’djust been diagnosed with some kidney infection and would need a lot of expensive treatment if he were to be cured. The alternative was for him to have a transplant which would be lots more expensive. He asked for a loan for N200,000 and promised to pay me as soon as he got his car allowance which was being processed by his office.

Months after he was due to pay me, he kept on telling me one sob story after the other. In the end I had to appeal to his wife – I needed my money desperately. His wife was gobsmacked. According to her, that was the first she would hear about any kidney problem, and as for the car loan, he already got that before he even approached me for his bogus treatment.

When I confronted him, he said he needed the money to pay off an outstanding loan he got from his office, or he would lose his job. It seems he kept on hopping from one lie to the other, but I never knew he would descend as low as inventing a serious disease. I don’t know if I’ll ever get my money back, and I feel let down.

Augustus, by e-mail.

Dear Augustus,

In spite of the adage you should “neither a lender nor borrower be,” many of us keep falling for the trap of people intent on a good con. Simply put, you’d been had conned by your own flesh and blood. Of course, it hurts and you have a difficult decision to make – either you write off the money and never trust your brother again or try to get it back by whichever means you could. Being conned by a stranger is bad enough, but by your own flesh and blood is far worse. Whatever happens, you need to move on  with your life.