By Morenike Taire
WHENEVER there is talk of domestic violence, a common standing joke is of women who beat their husbands up. Definitely a very uncommon phenomenon, there is every possibility of seeing a rise in the phenomenon in our society in the near future.
Reasons attributed for this include lower tolerance for male aggression on the domestic front on one hand, and by the society in general.
With women taking on bigger economic roles in our society, they are not only in better positions to seek redress in domestic violence situations; they are now more empowered to defend themselves. Many times, this defence takes a violent form and in extreme situations result in death.
In such situations, it becomes difficult to determine who the victim is, particularly given the inadequacies of our local domestic violence laws. As a result, women who have suffered silently in the hands of violent men in the domestic situation for long end up behind bars for killing the same men in self defense.
The emotional trauma of having killed a person is often compounded by the incarceration. If it is a marital situation and children are involved, they are now orphaned as a result, and equally suffer psychological disturbances.
On the other hand, there are genuine cases in which women, whether by acculturation or superior strength, play the bully to the extent that life is endangered. The norm is for male victims of domestic violence to be in denial or to suffer in science.
Psychologists say if denial in male to female domestic violence is rampant, it is even more so with female to male violence. “Chances are, a man would not want to complain in order to appear sissy or appear less of a man”. A piece of research showed witnesses to female on male violence looking bored, while witnesses to male to female aggression look frightened.
This ought not to be so, since both men and women have a right to not be subject to abuse, the right to leave it, and need sources of healing for it.
With so much access to arms, this is a somewhat more dangerous situation than male to female violations with regards to the possibility of seeing a rise. When we ignore male victims of domestic abuse, we also ignore their children, who continue to be damaged by witnessing the violence regardless of how severe it is. We cannot break this intergenerational cycle by ignoring half of it.
Xpressions: A new found hope: Nigeria gets her groove back
LAST year, when Nigeria made a bong and a dance, as we well should, there was a lot of pessimism and complaints about the state of the nation. The bomb blast, controversial to this day as far as responsibility for it goes, did not help matters at all.
Rather, the bad impression was left in the mouths of Nigerians of a palpably more dangerous country, one in which a citizen can be going about their normal business and just get blown away for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
A new, never before seen dimension had been introduced and with it came depression which, interestingly, was missing during this year’s independence anniversary celebrations. With the religious services being pushed forward and accusations and denials flying around about the reason for this, it is not less that surprising that Nigerians are, after 51 years, finally counting their blessings.
Clearly, something changed the game in this respect. Could it be the elections?
Falana slams government, so what else is new?
VOLCANIC eruptions could be the metaphor for the way Femi Falana has always expressed his public views. Like a typical member of the Nigerian human rights community, he speaks like the left, lives like the right and gets away with living the paradox.
What else is there to do? Not surprisingly, it was with much passion that he criticized the present administration’s economic policies, particularly those that are Bretton Woods informed. His claims are not original by any means- classic leftist.
Bretton Woods are behind the more recent agitation by government to remove the so called fuel subsidy, we all know, but it is about time for organized Labour to solidify