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Will I ever find a boyfriend?

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Dear Bunmi,

I’m 21 and an undergraduate. I’ve never really had a boyfriend, just a few male friends. I’ve never been able to go through with having sex. I recently met a great guy but I would only let him kiss me, and in the end he got fed up that we couldn’t have sex. I’m now scared I might never have a relationship. Please, help!

By e-mail

Dear Rukky,
If a guy leaves you simply because you won’t go to bed with him, be rest assured he’s only interested in you for the sex. And, that’s not the kind of guy you should be having a relationship with.

So, don’t have sex just because you feel you should – or because you’re being pressured. Hang on for someone you get along with, who goes at your pace when it comes to making love, and who can guide you through losing your virginity when it feels    right!

I want to dye down under!

Dear Bunmi,
I’m in my mid-30s and have started going grey in my nether regions. My husband and I are still very keen on oral sex and he has started noticing the gray, streaks. I’ve learnt that one can effectively dye one’s pubic hair, but don’t know how. I told a friend about it, but she said she’s resorted to the Brazilian shave.

What exactly did she mean? I didn’t want to show my ignorance by asking her?
By e-mail

Dear Mary,
If you l00k around some shops, there are some hair dyes specially made for male hair and beards and they take only five minutes to work. If you can get one of these, it can be effectively used for hair.

Cover your nether regions with plenty of oily cream or cotton wool and don’t forget to condition the hair afterwards.

As for the Brazilian, you must have heard about the Brazilian Carnival and seen photographs of female participants in their revealing body suits with no embarrassing hair jutting out. This is because the ladies shave off the area and leave only an arrow strip.
You could go for that too, especially if your husband is all for it.

 I still fancy my ex

Dear Bunmi,

I recently ran into my ex at a social event and was amazed, I still felt the same about him. We now work in the same office and I overheard him saying he still fancies me too. Do you think I should just forget about what I heard, it’s a bit tricky to speak to him as our office is an open one. But, if I let him go again, I’ll never forgive myself.

By e-mail

Dear Mulikat,

There is no harm in your letting your ex know you still fancy him. You both obviously want the same thing; so, it would be a shame to miss the chance. But, a note of warning. The last the two of you were together, you didn’t make things work. And, unless things have altered between the two of you, you still won’t be able to make things work.

So, think about what caused you to part. Was sex dull? Did you argue? You can find solutions to these problems by talking things over with your ex when you have the opportunity. A relationship will only work second time round if you change what went wrong first time round.

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