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Dad abandoned me when I needed him most. Should I forgive?

With Florence Amagiya

It’s been twenty years since I last heard the heart broken story of my run – away biological father, somehow my mother had passed the stag of talking about it. I was told by her that I was still in the womb when he ran away from his responsibility. She said, they were dating and she had thought she was everything to him. My father was a widower when they met or so he said. He said he wanted to marry her. So they were seeing themselves prior to their wedding. Each time she talked about visiting her family, he will tell her that he loved her too much to go into marriage without getting prepared for it.

These were the stories and issues between them for two years until she noticed she was pregnant. She told him about it, to see if this will hasten the marriage plans, but instead it brought the worst out of him. He screamed and cursed and said everything he could possibly say to her dismay. He advised that she goes for an abortion, but she won’t hear of it thinking he was only joking. He told her that he was traveling and that when he returns she will understand him if she hasn’t done as instructed. So my mother waited until my dad came back and told her the ugly tale of lies without end. That he won’t be tied down by her because his wife is alive and fine. And that he has being deceiving her all along.

He left and my mother brought me up herself. As God will have it, my mother met an elderly man who had lived all his adult life in the States and returned without his children because their mother is a white woman and she has refused to relocate with him. So he married my mother, adopting me and I became a rich man’s child.

Mum has forgotten her past and is very happy because of her new found love and what it came with. On the other hand, I am not complaining. I travelled to the States for my doctorate, returned with the driver who picked me up at the airport. Came down from the vehicle and sent the driver on an errand. On getting to the house, I heard mum crying, while daddy was consoling her. I eavesdropped to hear the cause of her stress. I heard the third voice saying he has a right to meet his own son.

At that point, I couldn’t wait anymore, so I ran to see the person talking and met the nightmare and dilemma in the form of a man kneeling on the floor begging my mum and on seeing me, started pleading with me also.

Hear what our stars have to say

Read on…

Yvonne

Forgive
Yvonne Enakhena Actress

Yes it is pathetic story and it is very easy not to forgive him, but I will after I have dealt a while with him.

Treasure

 

Tradition says…
Treasure Nwigwe, Actress

What the father did in the story was bad, but he is my father and when I am getting married, tradition will require me to come with my father. It makes you a proud daughter if you are from my place in Ibo land, to have your dad with you. So when I am getting married, l will take my dad with me to my husband’s people. For that reason, I will forgive him.

uche

Let go
Uche Nnanna, Actress

The issue here can make anybody heart- broken and harden to the extent of not forgiving him. But we are all humans and to err is human, but to forgive is divine indeed. I will forgive him bearing in mind that there are reasons for everything that happens in life. He certainly will suffer it.  After all, he didn’t enjoy the times I and my mum have shared together. And he can never be that close to me.

Amanda

Will support him, but…
Amanda Ebeye, Actress

I will forgive my father if he had done that to my mum and I. I will even take care of him when I can, but he will never live in the same house as l am. He showed that l was nothing to him when he asked my mum to terminate my pregnancy. What if my mother had obeyed him? I won’t have had opportunity of being in this world. That will teach him a lesson in life.

Mary

Never!
Mary Ganaah, Actress

I won’t forgive a father that does that to his unborn child and the mother of the child. Let’s be real here! Would he have come to ask for forgiveness if l had died like he wanted? He came because we have met fortune. Stories, I won’t listen to him and the rubbish he has to say. To me, he died the day he walked out on my mum. End of discussion!


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Comments expressed here do not reflect the opinions of vanguard newspapers or any employee thereof.