Helen Ovbiagele, Woman Editor

Violence, whatever the dimension, is a terrible thing, whether you are a victim or an onlooker, although some in the latter category, may feel so unconcerned that they may even think it is exciting watching people bloodied.   That is, until they become victims when they experience the nightmare that comes with violence.

The other week, a 22-year-old man in the USA shot a member of parliament in the head while she was addressing her constituents. He also caused the deaths of several other people including a child while others sustained varying degrees of injuries.

Here in Nigeria, violence broke out again  in Jos, on Christmas eve, and since then one or two northern states have experienced outbreaks of violence; lives were lost and places of worship were razed down. The rest of the country is not left out, as just about anything can trigger off violence – from simple argument between friends, to political differences, ethnic/ethnic differences, struggle to maintain control of motor parks, even quarrels in the home.

All over the world, no country is safe from violence, as it is no longer restricted only to those countries where there is war.  How did the world get to this stage where human beings are keen on inflicting grievous body harm on fellow human beings, to the extent of taking other people’s lives?

Experts say that no one is born with violence in his/her system.  Rather, we learn violence from our experiences, either as a victim or as an onlooker/reader/watcher.

If as parent and teachers we control, from the outset, what our very young children read, watch,  play with, and the friends they move with, we would be able to nip in the bud any inclination on their part  to imbibe or embrace violence.  Violent kids grow into violent adults, unless there is divine intervention somewhere along the way.

We had a huge response on our write-up on this plague which is destroying many countries around the world.

“Madam, a child who is exposed to violence in the home, will eventually embrace violence in his/her life.  We cannot deny the fact that violent people usually get feared, and, so, they get their way.  Watching from a corner, a child who sees his father batter his mother and reduce her to a subservient trembling mass, or uses violence to settle any issue, may secretly adore that ‘power’ in his father, and believe that that is how life should be lived.  He starts with fighting his siblings/neighbours, school mates, and then the public, or, he may turn on that same parent who had been battering his other parent. Violence can easily get a person to lose control.  The parents may not be aware that he had  imbibed violence until the day he seriously injures somebody.

Parents should supervise their wards closely and ensure that they are brought up in an environment where dialogue, instead of physical assault, is used to settle differences.  Once that is inculcated in him, he would not succumb to using violence to get his way when he goes into the world.  Thanks.”  Roland, Mushin.”

‘’The other day in Surulere where I live, madam, I was shocked beyond imagination to see lethal weapons being  used by two secondary school pupils in a fight in the open, without fear.  I wept for my beloved country.  Thanks for your article and God bless you.  – Francis Okoro, Lagos.”

“Sister Helen, the media are mostly responsible for increased violence in the world.  Let us face facts.  The television, DVDs, internet, etc., show more violence than peace.  We are asked to monitor closely what our children watch, but this is not always possible because even the seemingly clean home videos we make in this country are full of violence; not to mention what the kids see on the streets in our big cities, where sane adults strip themselves naked, break a bottle and use it to inflict injuries on those they are quarrelling with.

”This is, of course, reported with glee by the media, and children read it. The government has to come up with very severe punishment for those displaying violence on the streets, and the law enforcement agencies shouldn’t treat such people with kids’ gloves either, but pull them in, and enforce the law.

A major problem in our country is that people caught in the act of very serious violence; be it domestic violence or any other form of violence,  are not made to feel the full impact of their action.  Whatever our position in the society, we should bear in mind that one could become a victim of violence if the authorities don’t take appropriate steps to curtail it. Even the perpetrators can become victims themselves. – Chidozie, Enugu.’‘

“My sister, the government is to blame for not letting its full wrath descend on perpetrators of violence. The world is full of enough calamities  that sometimes we have no control over.  Why then allow people turn on their fellow human beings and get away free? This is why all these atrocities continue in the world.  We can’t single out Nigeria for violence, but that shouldn’t make us fold our arms and watch people unleash mayhem.

Parents whose children are caught in violent activities have a case to answer. If the government makes us aware of this our responsibility, I am sure many parents will monitor their children more closely, and report to the law enforcement agencies, those that are spiralling out of control and are engaged in violent activities. Pupils spend a lot of time in the company of their teachers, and these ones are able to study these young people’s character. Rowdy pupils should be reported to their parents, and the school head will report to the management of the school so that appropriate action can be taken. Thanks, madam.   Maryam, Kaduna.’‘

“My opinion is that apart from violence watched on television, the toys given to our children can also launch them on a life of violence.  When you buy toy guns, knives, machets and armoured vehicles for your child, you get that child thinking of violence, because that is what these are used for.  Same thing if you give them computer games that depict violence.  It is like buying a cookery set for a little girl.  She would want to start cooking.  Yes, we should raise our kids to be peace-loving and to use dialogues to settle issues, but we should let them know why they can’t have those toys that depict violence, no matter how trendy or attractive they are. – Clara, Ibadan.’‘

“How do children come about violence? By watching adults – whether in movies or in person.  Who become violence loving adults and go on to become violent thugs?  Children who have been exposed to violent activities from childhood.

If we are to pursue the eradication or reduction of violence in our society with the same vigour we pursue money, I am sure it will be reduced greatly, if not wiped out in no time.  Adults should admit that they are the cause of violence in the world.  Period!   Tamu – Port Harcourt.

“Madam, how about including the fight against violence on the school curriculum and teaching it right up to the university level?  NGOs for peace, and law-enforcement agencies, religious leaders and elders can be involved in this, to teach our young people why they should shun violence.  I am sure, with time, these efforts will have the desired effects, particularly if lessons are spiced up with pictures from war-torn areas, or, even from street fights.  Thanks.  – Mrs. Ayoade, Lekki.”