By Olufemi – Kayode

The incessant   reportage of sexual violations against minors is cause for crying ‘It’s a Wolf’. However, the sexual molestation of minors is not a new phenomenon and has existed for generations in various forms. There has been a conspiracy against the females form the day of birth, first from the Garden of Eden and has rolled down over ages.
One imminent query is why do they sexually molest or violate children or any person at all? Big question, you may ask?  Human nature is the first thing that creeps to mind but the oddity is the age bracket and positions of perpetrators and victims.

The appalling nature of reports creates a reaction that connotes shock and sympathy when you encounter screaming headlines like , “Man from hell rapes two underage sisters”, “ I enjoy sex with little girls”, “Man defiles 3 year old”, It is the devil’s work! etc.

Denial, it can’t be true. These media people are exaggerating again. What a beast! They have insanity issues. No normal man can do this. It is the devil. These are some of the thoughts and spoken reactions.
Nevertheless, these reactions do not produce much other than sympathy like earlier said. And that does not have an action based response, but, Oma se oooooooooooo!!! “Poor girl”, What a pity!

It is important to note that sexual abuse is not novel news. What we are having is more disclosure of incidences, which cannot be compared still to the unreported and undiscovered cases.

What do we need? Empathy!!! What distinguishes sympathy and empathy? Why are our reactions not productive to address the issues of sexual violence against minors?

Why do different practitioners handle the matter with levity and some with utmost seriousness? The human factor of sympathy and empathy! Which is required? is the

Sympathy and empathy are separate terms with some very important distinctions. Sympathy and empathy are both acts of feeling, but with sympathy you feel for the person; you’re sorry for them or pity them, but you don’t specifically understand what they’re feeling. Sometimes we’re left with little choice but to feel sympathetic because we really can’t understand the plight or predicament of someone else.

It takes imagination, work, or possibly a similar experience to get to empathy.

Empathy can best be described as feeling with the person. Notice the distinction between for and with. To an extent you are placing yourself in that person’s place, have a good sense of what they feel, and understand their feelings to a degree.

It may be impossible to be fully empathetic because each individual’s reactions, thoughts and feelings to tragedy are going to be unique.

Yet the idea of empathy implies a much more active process. Instead of feeling sorry for, you’re sorry with and have clothed yourself in the mantle of someone else’s emotional reactions.

It is fairly easy to feel sympathetic to someone else’s difficulties. We can definitely pity others who have lost a loved one, undergone significant trauma like Sexual violence or faced terribly difficult times.

Those of us who daily see and or hear of these cases of sexual molestation against minors could certainly sympathise, but could we empathise?

Actually, many of us could, though few of us can lay claim to really knowing what it might be like to either be in the shoes of the victim, their family and the whole episode.

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Additional materials from http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-the-difference-between-sympathy-and-empathy.htm.