Attending social functions accompanied with oneâ€™s spouse in African traditional setting is an expression of love, maturity and reckoning. But sometimes, itâ€™s not inÂ the best interest of either of the party invited, especially when one of the couple in question is more familiar with the guests than the other. Indeed, such scenarios,Â have oftentimes led to misunderstanding between couples, either at the venue or on their wayÂ home.
In this edition,Â weâ€™re taking a look at the implication of attending social functions accompanied with oneâ€™s spouse. While some people subscribe to allowingÂ their spouse attend such functions alone, many others are opposed to the view, reasoning that itâ€™s out of place to let your better-half go nestling all alone.
She can go to the moon alone â€” Leo Mezie, Actor
My wife can afford to attend any social function she wishes to attend alone. Itâ€™s not compulsory that we go to parties together, unless we have the opportunity to do so.
Recently, I was invited to a movie premiere which I couldnâ€™t attend because of other commitments, and I asked my wife to attend on my behalf.
It is only when you donâ€™t trust your wife that you keep suspecting every move she makes. I can allow my wife to travel with a male boss because I trust her.
Again, thereâ€™s an Igbo adage that goes this way: â€˜ogbu mma anaghi ekwe mma ga ya na azuâ€™whichn simply means that only people with questionable characters suspect others.
If youâ€™re used to doing evil, you keep suspecting that you have evil people around you. If you have a clean heart towards your fellow man, youâ€™ll live a free life, which also means that you can trust your wife.
The man whoâ€™s used to chasing other peopleâ€™s wives will always feel that some other person will equally take his wife. So, heâ€™s afraid of letting her attend social functions.
I think our African men need a reorientation on the topic â€˜trustâ€™. First, you should not for any reason marry anybody that you canâ€™t trust. Partnership is all about trust and marriage is partnership, so no marriage should hold where thereâ€™s no trust.
I love and trust my wife. So she can go to the blues alone for I know that sheâ€™ll always come back to me safe and sound.
Iâ€™ll protect what belongs to me â€” Vivien Onukwufor, lawyer
Iâ€™ll like to attend social functions with my spouse considering the things that go on in such gatherings. My presence there will enable meÂ to control his movements, eating and drinking.
Why do you think many women follow their husbands everywhere? It is not only because of the babes.When youâ€™re there, the possibility that heâ€™ll not eat or drink too much is very high.
Secondly, the babes. When youâ€™re there, heâ€™ll also not have much time to look at them. That is why you must be smartly dressed when attending such functions so that heâ€™s not cut up in the fancy of other women. Donald Dukeâ€™s wife is a very good example of what Iâ€™m saying. She follows him everywhere, even at functions that do not really need her presence. Be wise and protect what is yours.
Donâ€™t want to attend any function with her â€” Charles Elendu, Web designer
I donâ€™t even like attending functions with my wife at all. She attends those functions she was invited to alone while I attend mine, simple.
Iâ€™m not this kind of man that wants to be attached to anybody anywhere. I like to be free and alone, especially at events so that I donâ€™t put myself in the position where I have to start looking for her comfort.
It is not even every time that I like to see my wife around the house. I just feel that she should go and look for something to do. The truth is that I canâ€™t spend upto 7-8 hours with my wife, sheâ€™ll be distracting me.
Only if the celebrant is a relative â€” Anthony Iniobong, Web designer
Iâ€™ll allow her to attend such functions only on the grounds that the celebrant is a relative. I wonâ€™t be free to leave her in the hands of people I donâ€™t know, whether itâ€™s an official one or not. In fact, I donâ€™t want my wife to get involved in any office party unless weâ€™re going together simple.
Their colleagues at the office must make provision for guests if they really need her presence in that function.
Nothingâ€™s wrong with that â€” Eniola Badmus, Actress
I donâ€™t see anything wrong with that. My husband can attend any function alone and â€™m not afraid of the babes because if theyâ€™re what heâ€™s looking out for, I know he can get them anywhere. He must not wait to attend social functions before he can catch up with them.
Some men are also fond of insisting that their wives do not attend any function with the.Â I want to advise those women who find themselves under such men to be calm with their husbands for itâ€™s not a big deal.
Only if Iâ€™m not in town â€” Renny Johnson, Publicist
Iâ€™ll only allow my husband to attend social functions alone if Iâ€™m not in town. If Iâ€™m in town then nothing stops from attending whatever function together.
The second reason that will cause me to allow him to attend any social function alone is if itâ€™s a formal gathering where my presence is not necessary at all.
Some men can actually insist that their women donâ€™t follow them to functions on the grounds that they donâ€™t want to be disturbed, not necessarily because they want to flirt around.
Only an official gathering â€”Â Jide Idowu, Artist
Unless itâ€™s an official gathering, especially her officeâ€™s end of year party or something like that where sheâ€™s not allowed to invite an extra person.
But all the same, Iâ€™ll like to be there present so that all those her bosses who have been looking for an opportunity to mingle with her will at least be scared of my presence, even if itâ€™s just for that moment.