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How behaviour determines response

By  Agbolade Omowole

Our behaviour determines the kind of response we get. Your words may even determine if you will get a positive or a negative response in an interactive process.

Consider these statements.You must get to the office by 7 a.m every morningPlease, kindly get to the office by 7 a.m every morning to enable us serve our customers better.

Statement 1 will trigger a negative response while statement 2 will trigger a positive response. Effective communication is more than what you say; it has to do with how you get your message across to others. If you communicate with others based on your emotions_how you feel, you will likely trigger a negative response. Great communicators gear their interaction on what they want to achieve, not how they feel.

Neuro Linguistic Experts tell us that communication is determined by the response you get. So accept responsibility for the other person’s reaction to what you say.

Our behaviour triggers a positive or negative response. If you make your request look like you are making an order or insisting on something what happens? The other person will probably disagree with you or resist your request. He or she may present an alternative request or suggestion equally forcefully.

By inviting people to consider your request or suggestion, you trigger a positive response. The other person will probably consider your request, request for more information or fine_tune your ideas and suggestions. He or she may, however, give a genuine reason why they feel it will not work and provide an alternative.

In tricky situations, emotions can run high and it is easy for us to gear our behaviour to our dominant emotions rather than to the outcome we want. Has someone ever shouted at you while making a request? How did you feel? Whenever you are communicating, do not let your emotions override reasoning. Let your anticipated response determine how you communicate with others.

Accept responsibility for the responses you get. If you get a negative or a positive response, your behaviour triggered it. Do not vent your anger on others. Be careful of how you communicate when you are emotional. If you don’t, you may trigger a negative response.Tone masy determine the kind of response you get. A high tone makes your request look like a command; it may trigger a negative response.

A low tone may also trigger a negative response. The other person may feel you do not mean what you are saying. In most communication, a neutral tone of voice does the magic. It makes your request inviting.

Gestures add meanings to our words. Frowning when making a request may trigger a negative response. Smiling is more inviting and may trigger a positive response. Experts tell us that only 7 percent of our communication is determined by the words we use. More than 50 percent of our communication is determined by our body language. The human eye can give about 250 different expressions. Make your body language congruent with your words. Learn to pay attention your gestures. They matter.

Being positive triggers a positive reaction. A positive person is optimistic and sees only the good side of every thing. A positive disposition is communicated to the other person subconsciously. The reason you like being around some people is perhaps, because they are positive.
Your behaviour determines the kind of response you get.

The response can either be positive or negative. When emotions run high, they can override logical reasoning, and one might trigger a negative response in the process. You have to accept responsibility for the responses you get. Remember, gestures improve communication.


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