By Bridget Amaraegbu
Peter and Jane have been married for more than two decades. Although they are still very fond of each other, a certain event that happened on the eve of their 10th anniversary almost tore the couple apart.
Jane had gone to the bank where the couple had a joint account only to discover that her husband had drained the account. Angry at the betrayal, Jane pulled out of the joint business, more out of frustration than the flimsy excusesÂ her beloved husband gave on how he paid some ghost workers.
This week, Bridget Amaraegbu takes a lookÂ at the problems associated with couples maintaining a joint account.
Itâ€™s not a problem but… Mary Uranta, Actress
I donâ€™t think Iâ€™ll find it very difficult to run the same account with my husband. But I will not put all my money in that account because itâ€™s always proper not to put all your eggs in one basket.
Again, I canâ€™t tell if my husband is really putting all his income. So, to avoid being fooled at last, it will be safer to make it a fifty percent thing.
Yes, I know youâ€™ll tell me that Iâ€™m not being sincere but nobody is sincere. How do I believe that my husband is sincerely putting all his income in that account? How do I prove that he will not be the man that every other man is? What is that conviction that heâ€™ll not wake up one morning to pick a second or third wife?
Listen carefully, no matter how much any man claims to love you, donâ€™t always relax and feel that you are the only sugar in his tea. He may choose to keep as many cubes of sugar in his tea as he deems it possible. And what can you do? Nothing my dear.
Have we not seen cases where so called high society men condescend so low to impregnate their house maids? Do you think they did it because their wives could not satisfy them? No!
Thereâ€™s this thing that keeps making some men feel they should taste another soup, abi na only egusi soup im go de chop always? No. Or have you not heard stories of men who ended up marrying the cleaners in their offices?
My dear, you have to be wise in doing things like this because if you go ahead to put all your money in that same account, he will still take part of your money to shine up his new found love without your consent. You will only know the truth the day you get to the bank one day, to find out that the whole money is gone.
That is why you must save elsewhere for your childrenâ€™s sake. Of course, if you donâ€™t, nobody will tell you when the trouble starts. Imagine that your children are chased out of school one day and you donâ€™t have anything to send them back, simply because your husband had used all your savings to marry and maintain another woman. What can you do? Nothing. You canâ€™t kill anybody, even though you may be tempted to do such but you simply canâ€™t do it. If you dare, youâ€™ll go to jail and your children will still have to suffer more than you could ever imagine.
How I wish our people can truly be sincere. I would have been the happiest being because I can equally be sincere in my dealings. But for the fear of insincerity in us, I cannot afford to put all my income in the same account with my husband.
Another serious reason why I donâ€™t think itâ€™s very good to run the same account with my husband is the insecurity of our financial institutions. Letâ€™s assume weâ€™re using Webstar Bank and it parks up one day, what becomes of us? Both of us will have to go bankrupt.
The event of fraud is another strong reason. In this country today we hear stories of people who are duped everyday. At least, if I have a different account somewhere, I should be able to carry the family along. It may not necessarily be that the man collected the money to run another love affair, some other things could come up and take away all the money in a blink.
OneÂ place where such things could be useful is in the event of death. Whether itâ€™s the man or woman who dies first, the other party remains the only person who is signatory to the account. That person does not have to start going through the stress of whether he or she is the next of kin or not. It will amaze you to know that many black people do not use their spouses as their next of kin. Some either use their brother or sister, and in the event of death, the other party is left at the mercy of whatever he gets from the said brother or sister.
Generally, Iâ€™ll conclude by saying that sharing the same account with your spouse has more disadvantages than advantages
No way â€” Mogaji Alex, Make up artist
No! Even the Bible states clearly that money remains the root of all evil. So, Iâ€™m afraid we may have problems if we try to do that. Sincerely, Iâ€™ll never think about it.
Yes, we can have a special account for the family upkeep but not a particular account where all our income will go in. I prefer to run my money in my own way and let her run hers. Please, nobody should even raise that kind of suggestion for me.
It will create problems â€”Â Pascal Izuchukwu, Lab scientist
No. My reason is that my wife will want to monitor everything I do with cash from there. Iâ€™m not saying this because I donâ€™t love my wife. Letâ€™s leave love out of this. In fact, sharing the same account with my wife will create more problems for my household. So, I donâ€™t want to think itâ€™s possible.
Listen, there are certain things I would love to do without her consent, like assisting my family members and so on, which is certain that most women will never welcome. I could still have some other personal needs which may not be part ofÂ her agenda.
If he earns higher, yes â€” Dayo Babatunde, Model
I think itâ€™s conditional because it will depend onÂ how much we both earn. If I earn higher than he does, then Iâ€™ll not agree to that.
Itâ€™s better for us to open an account where we put in a specific amount monthly, based on our income level, than to look at it from the angle where we have to put in all our income together.
Every mother has to be wise with spending because most times, the children belong to her. So, their security lies in her hands. Therefore, if you go put in all your money in the same account with your husband, and he wakes up one day to marry another woman with the same money you banked together, then you are in soup.
We are better off without itâ€” Dickson Iroegbu, Movie maker
Yes, if that account has to do with the family upkeep but no if it has to do with business. My wife is a civil servant and I make my own money from the street. So, it will be difficult to bring both of them to put in one account. Besides that, I want her to be independent. I donâ€™t want a situation where sheâ€™ll have to seek my permission before she can do everything she wants to do. Weâ€™re simply better having separate business accounts. After all, my wife remains my only next of kin and thereâ€™s no argument about that.
Men will alawys be insincere â€” Benita Nzeribe, Actress
Why not if only my spouse will equally be sincere to that account and the family upkeep? You see, the problem is how do I even know that heâ€™s been sincere? Men will always be men.
On my own, I may not have any problem with that because Iâ€™m not planning to have another family elsewhere. But you never can tell with the men. So, Iâ€™ll have to be very careful in matters like that.