Although ikiri is an ugly animal, the metaphor entailed by the tenacity of its grip reflects Ohakim’s belief that the governorship of Imo State is firmly in his hands, such that it would take a political tsunami for the grip to be pried open by any of his opponents in the April 26 gubernatorial election. Lions are known as kings of the forest, because of their strength and ability to subdue any prey.

This column could easily have been titled I dey laugh too O! And, it would still have been apt. In fact, if all the reasons for my post-election laughter were to be written and analysed, it would require a whole booklet to do justice to it all. Since this piece is being read today, Sunday, May 29, 2011, the day President Goodluck Jonathan is being sworn in as the substantive Chief Executive Officer of Nigeria Incorporated, it is perhaps the best day to recap a few issues which others have either habitually or inadvertently or deliberately forgotten.

A fortnight ago, one of my previously cherished neighbours, Professor Sam Ajayi, a pharmacist, shouted across the fence to salute me, but his rather good gesture ended in a fiasco as we both swore never to relate again. The bone of contention was his caustic remarks about some of my colleagues in the media whom he claims visit his Agency regularly to “beg him for money”.

Niger State is famed, on the one hand, for Power -on account of two contradistinctive sources of power and noted, on the other, for history -on account of two opposing causes of history. As Power State, she is the source of two voltages: one political, being the birth place of two former Military Heads of State, (IBB and Abdulsalami), and the other hydro-electrical, -being home to the nation’s only two hydro- dams, (Kainji and Shiroro).

In the write-up with the above title, I spoke about how a gsm service provider began to deduct N100 every month from my account for a ring tune I hadn’t consciously ordered for. On the advice of a reader, I did take my phone to one of the outlets of the service provider in question, two weeks ago, to have the ring tune removed. I was attended to by a polite young lady who asked if I didn’t like that particular ring tune. I explained that I didn’t order it, and wanted it removed. She agreed immediately and then fiddled with the keys on my phone. “Ma, I’ve removed it. You won’t feel the effect immediately, but after about four or five hours.”

Parliament is the powerful engine room of the grand edifice of democracy. There, is where we make or mar the sovereign. A powerful parliament is an agenda-setting institution. Whatever happens in the hallowed chamber of the people sets the pace for public governance. When we examine it thoroughly, the fight for democracy, all that battle we, my generation, fought on the streets for a return to democracy was in truth for the reconstitution of the parliament and, of parliamentary oversight over the executive.

Friends,let me add the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in the UK – and I live in Lagos now. The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves – including the children of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there – regardless how wealthy their parents are. And, I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same – the exception being those of us status-conscious Nigerians.

Abiola Ajimobi of Oyo State and Ibikunle Amosun of Ogun State are not new to high political offices. Both were in the forefront of political activity. Abiola was a senator of AD and Amosun of PDP. Both were contending governors for 2007 under ANPP. They all had long battles which they both lost.

This is a time of fear and anxiety, of hope and expectations, and of plots and counter plots among those who are desirous of being considered for appointment to the new cabinet at the federal level, as well as in the State governments.

SOME may not notice the gradual death of football, which will ultimately affect the health of sports. Some think the growing number of factions in the Nigeria Football Association (it insists on calling itself Nigeria Football Federation, illegal as it knows the name is) does not mean anything.