“marriage is like a flower; if it is not watered with intimacy and love, it will wither and die. “Intimacy is what keeps the flame burning in a marriage”—Marriage expert

The first time a woman came to us with a complaint that her husband was sexually abusing their three children—two girls and a boy—I told her: “Madam, two things, either you are mad to accuse your husband of such heinous deeds or your husband is mad to lay his hands on his own children.” Incest, specifically father-daughter liaison, has been with humankind for a long time. Lot not only slept with but deflowered his two daughters (please leave the drunkenness details for another day. Deflowering two virgins in two successive days without being conscious of the act must be one of the mysteries in the Bible) Genesis 19: 32-35.

Monday, January 26, is another Spouse Day, a day set aside to celebrate and honour our spouses. It is a day when we should not only tell our spouses we appreciate them, but show it. Actually we should appreciate our spouses always; this day is only meant to draw attention to the need to appreciate our spouses. I dedicate this year’s Spouse Day to some super spouses. The first group of super spouses is those who have stuck to their spouses through childlessness.

My hard-line views on LGBT (lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders) notwithstanding, I sympathise with brand expert, Kenny Badmus, who is gay and HIV positive. According to Badmus, who is going through a divorce with his wife: “After six years together, I knew I was not getting any better. I still loved men. And one day, because I didn’t want to cheat on her, I humbly asked her that we should go our separate ways. That was when all hell broke loose. She suddenly forgot about how it all started.

You cannot be a complete person until you learn to empathise, that is, put yourself in the position or situation of others. I have always loved and respected my parents-in-law since I met them; they are nice people and we are now one family. Moreover they allowed me marry their daughter without any hassles even though I was a complete stranger when I met them.