By CHIOMA GABRIEL

Not every man a woman meets is meant to be his wife and not every relationship must end up in marriage because there are husband materials and friend materials, but when people end up marrying those who ought to be just friends, they would end up having all manner of marital problems. But when a man marries his real wife, ordained for him by God and a woman marries a man ordained for her by God, even if they encounter problems along the line, they always overcome because God has purposed them to be together.

Ichie Felix Obiakor, his beautiful wife…50 years ago

Today is a day worth celebrating for Ichie Felix Obiakor, his  beautiful wife, Rita, their seven children and 21 grandchildren. The couple is celebrating 50 years of married life and that is one celebration many couples in today’s Nigeria cannot afford. Many have tried and failed in the area of marriage and some have lost their spouses and so could not celebrate. Others are victims of broken marriages.

To show appreciation to God, Ichie and  Rita have thrown open their doors for friends and relations to come and celebrate with them today, April 5, in their country home, Adazi Nnukwu, Anambra State.

“ All that glitters is not gold. The most beautiful woman is not the most marriageable just like the most handsome man is not. Sometimes what God desires for a man or woman may not be what they desire for themselves and, that is why in Igboland where we come from, we ask questions about the background of the persons we want to marry to know their family history and whether such a marriage will be positive. You do not just meet a man or a woman and jump into marriage and sometimes, too, God approves of our choices for ourselves when the love is too strong.”

Speaking about his wife of  50 years, Ichie said, “ In 1962 while I was working in the Ministry of Justice, Enugu ,l was transferred to Umuahia. Coincidentally, I was living at No 21, Item street with the  late Chief  Charles Azaka who then worked  at  P & T, Umuahia. It was at that time that a little angel was visiting the family. l later learnt she was his niece and that she was working at Shell Hospital in Port-Harcourt as a nurse. As God would have it,l was transferred to Port-Harcourt in  1963 and that gave me the opportunity of being closer to her and I found that she was a good wife material.

In 1964, l was transferred back to Umuahia but was in contact with her.

“ Her decency and humility attracted me so much that I made a marriage proposal which she accepted.

I wedded her on the 9th of January, 1965 at St Finbarrs Catholic Church, Umuahia. God has been good to us throughout the years and blessed the marriage with more than half a dozen children and over 20 grandchildren.

“ The choice of a good wife is hard but with God, it is easy. My choice fell on Rita (Decency), the queen of peace. God is love and to marry in love means to marry in God. We are ever grateful to God for leading us through these five decades of married life especially in those years when a woman’s place was believed to be in the kitchen but she was educated and had a career. But she didn’t let that get into her head. She was humble and has remained so even all through the years. It was too long ago that she retired and she remained a pillar of strength which is a rare virtue in many relationships.”

Also speaking about her experience, Rita  said, “I graduated from the School of Nursing at Holy Rosary, Emekuku Owerri, in 1962. After school of nursing, I took appointment in Shell Hospital in Port Harcourt. I worked there till 1963, and visited my uncle, Charles Azaka, and his family at Umuahia during my vacation. A young man, Felix Obiakor, was also living in the same compound with his brother, Stephen. I did not see him during my trip but he saw me . Then he started making inquiries about me from my sister, Felicia Azaka, who told him everything about me.

“However, after my holiday, I went back to Port Harcourt. One day, he came to my hostel in Port Harcourt with his friend asking of me. When I came out, he introduced himself and said that he was looking for me. I told him I  was the type keeping boyfriends, and he said he was looking for a wife, not a  girl friend. I told him I could  not  marry him because he was too handsome, that throughout my life, I did not fight or quarrel with anybody and, as such, could  not fight over him. He left and came back after some weeks and continued asking me to marry him. My roommate at that time, Patricia Anyanwu, advised me to accept his proposal and I accepted.

Of all the suitors that came to me, he was the only one I accepted, because I loved him so much.

“We started courting. In 1964, we went to Onitsha to see my  uncles: The  late Fidelis Azaka, the late Ben Azaka and my senior brother, the late Godwin Azaka, for introduction.

“Later, he came with his family members for the traditional marriage we had our wedding on the 9th of January, 1965 at St Finbarr’s Catholic Church, Umuahia.

“After the wedding, we experienced challenges associated with marriage . We had our first set of twins, Nnaemeka and Chinyere, then Chijioke; another set of twins, Jane and Jude, before Chinedu and Ngozi came along. During this period, we went on transfer to Onitsha, Aba and then Lagos in 1977.

“We watched our children move from one primary school to the other and then to secondary school, university and then graduation.

“ We nurtured them all through these years until they started working. Today, we have about 21 grand children.

“50  years have gone past and we are still living together. It is not easy but to God be the glory. “To appreciate God for keeping our marriage for 50 years, we are opening our doors to friends and relations to come and celebrate with us on  April 5, 2015 in our village, Adazi-Nnukwu,  Anambra State”.