She turned 70 on January 11, 2025. Sorounded by Army officers, Mrs Caroline Olufunke Kofo knows what it means to serve the country, at home and abroad. Her husband retired from the Army as a Colonel, her first son is a serving Colonel and first daughter is married to a top officer.

Many of us may not understand what goes on in the homes of military officers who can be called up at anytime to serve the country. Some of the servicemen never made it back from the front, leaving widows and children, who may not even be remembered after the customary January 15, Armed Forces Remembrance Day.

I listened as Mrs Kofo reminisce about a certain festive period when the family gathered at Ogba, Lagos to celebrate. In the midst of it all, her husband left without ceremony. The next they heard was that he was in Badagry. And the officer confirmed that duty called in Liberia.

She was full of gratitude to God for keeping the head of the family to see her clock 70. They were able to train all their four children, from cradle to adulthood and are today proud grandparents, devoted to serving humanity in their own little way.

Who would not be proud and grateful to have a husband who travelled round the world, facing battles and keeping peace, without scratching any part of his body? Appearance is deceitful. Col. Kofo is not the swashbuckling type. One may need a seer to convince the uninformed that this man commanded military formations.

As a subaltern, Kofo was in Lebanon as part of the Nigerian Battalion ( NIBATT ), engaged in peace keeping operations as United Nations Interim Force in Lebanon ( UNIFIL ). It was not a tea party as two officers and eight soldiers lost their lives.

A senior officer, Brig (Gen.) James Onoja, survived an ambush laid by Palestinians, although with injuries. Lt. Col Alfred Gom was jailed for 15 years and deported for  arms smuggling. Kofo served meritoriously and returned safely.

 Major Daniel Bamidele, an Operations officer made it back home but ended up losing his life after being implicated in a 1985 military coup. Generals Ishaya Bakut and Tunji Olurin would later go for more peace keeping duty, as Commanders of the Economic Community of West African States Monitoring Group (ECOMOG). Gen. Abdusalami Abubakar rose to the position of Head of State.

In Liberia, Charles Taylor and his group were not happy with Nigeria’s Big Brother role that stemmed their advance. Two Nigerian journalists, Tayo Awotunsin and Krees Imodibie were murdered simply because of their identity. Over 500 thousand officers and men of the Nigeria Army were killed. Kofo did not receive one bullet wound.

When I remember Awotunsin, goose bumps envelope me. His last moments before leaving Lagos for Monrovia did not show that it was the last time we would see. In his last message to Nigeria through telefax, he reported that President Samuel Doe whom he referred to as Kabiyesi, to beat Liberian Intelligence, was in danger.

From Lebanon to Liberia, Kofo also served in Bakassi. His wife ran the home effectively and did not spare the rod while training the children. They feared her more than their father. This strict mom was aptly named Margaret Thatcher by her kids.

As a young officer, Kofo was at the 72 Airborne  Battalion Makurdi during the January 31 Military Coup that saw Gen. Muhammadu Buhari emerge as Head of State. Commanding the Battalion was Col. Afaha Asam Nsudoh, who attended Mons Officers Cadet Course at the same time in 1962, as the new military leader.

President Shehu Shagari was taken to  Makurdi from Abuja. Kofo,as Battalion Adjutant,  received the deposed President. Modest as ever, the guest asked for water, praying mat and chicken. Told that there was order to restrict him to his flat, the response was equally simple. ‘ Why should I run away’, Shagari asked.

I guess, Shagari was not afraid to die and prepared for the worst after the Brigade of Guards in Abuja had killed one of the men behind the coup, Brig. Ibrahim Bako. Guards Commander, Brig. Bello Kaliel and one of his officers, Capt. Augustine Ayongo were retired for trying to stop the coup. Ayongo was discharged on December 13, 1984 at a time Buhari’s birthday was in the air.

Kofo later served in Jaji as Commander, 82 Mechanised Battalion and in Calabar, as Commander Army Amphibious Training School. He was also at the National Institute of Policy and Strategic Studies ( NIPSS ) Kuru, Bukuru.

All these training and exposure end outside the home where Mrs Kofo is the Brigade Commander. Her husband and children respect her space. If you do want to see the red side of the woman, just do not stress the man of her life.

In an amusing anectode about Mrs Kofo’s time as Iron Lady while Oga was away in battle, one of her sisters said, Col. Kofo was the officer gentleman, his wife made everyone believe she held the gun, ready to pull the trigger, for  the little children to behave. And indeed, they were scared stiff.

The same children, led by Col. Kofo Jnr, have continued to show gratitude to the woman who never made them believe that life was a bed of roses. Wherever they are, all over the globe, the tough mom they nicknamed Margaret Thatcher, is now Sweet Mother.

Not many wives of retired military officers would have their husbands by their side at 70 years, still bouncing. Mrs Kofo danced better than a school girl on January 11. The man behind her also sang and shook his body, glorifying the Lord.

The Kofos are enjoying life in retirement. There is no war deserving the man’s attention. All the children are doing well in their fields of endeavour, falling over themselves on who will host the senior citizens as holiday makers. The grandchildren are in touch, looking up to their parents to follow grannie and grandpa’s footsteps.