Dear Bunmi, last year, my husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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He’s now much better, but our s3x life has deteriorated.

I’m only 40 and I’ve tried to be understanding, but don’t know how much longer I can go without making love.

Dear Bunmi, I want things back to the way they used to be.

Christina, by e-mail.

Dear Christina,

A major life-threatening illness can put people off s3x completely.

So, I can see where your husband is coming from. But I also appreciate your point of view – this crisis has hit you hard and you need the comfort of sex.

There’s no easy answer, but two things will help.

The first is to listen to how your husband is feeling, and lovingly explain the impact his illness has had on you.

The second is physical affection. Even if love making is not on the agenda, ask your husband to give you cuddles and kisses to show you’re still close. 

Vanguard News